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tammyp26's avatar
tammyp26
Member
14 years ago

Chemo

Thanks for all the advice for the oncology appointment.  I walked into the hospital Friday to the extra large door with 'Cancer Care Unit' in large writing - thinking what the hell am I doing here? Can't believe this is my life now.  After waiting an hour to see the Dr, he sat me down and went through the pros and cons of having chemo.  Well in his opinion, the pros, due to my having triple negative breast cancer.  He was blunt - it's my choice if I have chemo or not, but with triple negative there's chemo and radiotherapy, no other options.

A computer printout confirms that my prognosis for recurrence and mortality is reduced if I have chemo.  At 39, who thought I'd be considering my 10 year mortality rate.  Now I have one, on paper, for breast cancer.

The side effects can be significant - it doesn't really make sense to me.  So I'm to put poisin in my body when I'm essentially cancer free.  This poison can cause more cancer (low percentage change) and heart problems - WTF?  I feel great now why make myself sick for the next 5 months?  And there's only one answer I have for that - and that is for my children. 

Poisoning myself with chemicals goes against everything I believe in but I've decided to go ahead with it.  The chance of the cancer coming back and spreading is too terrifying and at least this way I know I've done all I can.  2012 is a wipeout.

I start next week - who knows maybe I'll be one of those lucky people that don't have many side effects.  I've already chopped my hair off - short brown pixie cut (no point bothering with hair dye) and gone wig and scarf shopping in preparation.  

I'll be on six cycles.  I will have chemo on a given day (FEC type) and then 3 weeks later have it again.  The doc thought I may be unwell for 2/3 weeks.  I plan to not be that unwell LOL.  This will go for 3 cycles (9 weeks) and then I'll have a different chemo drug (Taxotere) for the next three cycles - so 18 weeks in all.  Then radiotherapy....but that's another story down the track.

So once again I'm about to walk into unknown territory - I feel quite ill about it all.  I just have to keep thinking it's for a short time in the whole scheme of things. I'm off for a lovely short break before it all starts so shall enjoy being fit and healthy and well while I can :)  

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