Chemo Round 11 - how its all become "normal"

Yesterday was chemo 11, 5 more to go.  And as I prowled around last night with the dex zing I pondered just how "normal" chemo had become.

From the initial shock, horror and anger of diagnosis to the trauma of surgery and the first chemo it is all now just part of the rountine.

The dietary changes are now normal.

The exercise routines are now normal.

The days when I shouldn't venture out are normal.

The days when I should are normal, and packed :)

Chemo day has a routine.  I understand the chemicals they are pumping into my body and the subsequent effects through the next week.

Flushing is normal.

Whipping the hat off anytime is normal.  No longer do I care about the people around me.  If they are shocked, not my problem :)

Drawing in my eyebrows is normal, not always equal but normal.

Laughter at the oddest things is normal. Like when I literally washed off the last of my eyebrows with the face flannel. 

My body not feeling normal is normal.  Cant remember when all my bits felt like my bits.

Acceptance of what the day will bring is now normal.  I am no longer stressing about the things I cant control - big learning curve that one.

Acceptance of what is coming has become normal.  Radiation - OK, Tests - OK.  Its all part of the treatment.

I am still suprised at what I read in various forms of literature on BC.  I still get joy and hope from the good stuff, and I get frustrated, angry and sad from other stuff. 

I am still overwhelmed by the support of my family, friends and medical staff.   And ever so thankful that I have not experienced the "poor" behaviour that so many pink chicks have

I am delighted when I get to meet up with chemosaubies for breakfast.  And the strangers who identify themselves as survivors and give me a hug.

I am always amazed at the strength of the people I see on chemo day.  Those who are in from their second or third round, those who are in the second year of chemo, those who are just finishing and those who are just starting.  My heart still breaks when I see those who are the same age as my children.

BC has become so normal I wonder what happens when all this is over and what my new normal will be.

Onwards I go.  Five more chemos to go, but whose counting :)