Dear@kmakm,
This is not the slightest derailment, it's in your face hard stuff, bringing up a whole lot of grief and worry and you are not acting like an angsty teenager, but like a normal person facing a lot of stuff that no sane person really wants to know about. Right now, your brain is full and you can't handle any more, not even your sister's understandable anxiety. Grumpy is just fine.Screaming angry off the chandelier is OK too. You are still you, you just don't have any precedent for how 'you' deals with all this because you haven't. Getting through to the next step in one piece, without actually hitting/ harming anyone, is a BIG major achievement. Let everyone know you need to stop and take a breath. Those who love you will understand.