Any Advice would help- thanks

Hello Bel, i acatually had three attempts to reply yesterday but in the midst of my meltdown ,my computer dropped off too. Any way i wanted to thank you so very much, you pulled me out of a hole yesterday. I did send you a persoanl message but not sure if  you received that either. You are so right in all that you said, especially the letting go of panic and fear. i go to bed feeling the fear and wake up in a panic, wondering about how mum got through the night. She was taken to emergengy yesterday with a high temp and being at home with my children and not being able to physically see her is so difficult, l spoke to her and she sounded ok but it is no the same as seeing she is ok. She is home now and ok but still with a high temp. Thank you once again fro being there exactly when l needed a cyber shoulder. cheers Nik

Hello Bel, i acatually had three attempts to reply yesterday but in the midst of my meltdown ,my computer dropped off too. Any way i wanted to thank you so very much, you pulled me out of a hole yesterday. I did send you a persoanl message but not sure if  you received that either. You are so right in all that you said, especially the letting go of panic and fear. i go to bed feeling the fear and wake up in a panic, wondering about how mum got through the night. She was taken to emergengy yesterday with a high temp and being at home with my children and not being able to physically see her is so difficult, l spoke to her and she sounded ok but it is no the same as seeing she is ok. She is home now and ok but still with a high temp. Thank you once again fro being there exactly when l needed a cyber shoulder. cheers Nik

You came to the right place,  in my experience, some-times the people who have cancer or similar experiences understand us more.  My Mum was diagnosed with Breast Cancer when I was in my 20's, and she was 55.  I am the one with breast cancer now, and she is in her 70's.  Its natural to be scared and panic and its great to be able to vent your emotions, no matter what ones, right here!  Try to step away from the idea of your Mum not being here, she is.  Not easy to do, but this is all about how we can pull ourselves back to the "here and now", I found.  You love her, and you feel helpless, and that is also normal for each person who cares about us.  Chemotherapy was some-thing quite unique, I had 6 of those, 7, and I am just finished Radiation.  

You will have good days and bad days, and most of the women on here are from the "strong" department and have friends who tell them "how brave they are, or how strong they are!"  For me, I was just doing what I had to do, and told to do, and what I read from the "My Journey Kit"  which you can obtain for free from the bottom of this page.  The bible will answer all the questions, and then you have fantastic support on the phone via you regional Cancer Council.  I am in Launceston and I have taken full advantage of all the support available here, all of which were from complete strangers.  I wasnt shy, I asked.

Always remember to never judge what will happen to your Mum by any-one elses story, its easy to focus on the bad stories.  I found at time what I read can make it harder to keep positive, but most of the time I could get answers about myself through my Breast Care Nurse, who introduced herself to me while I was in hospital.  The free Counsellors via the hospital are great too, most of us have cried into tissues infront of outsiders from family members.  Infact, I have made great friends now Im out of the treatment stage and happy to say I am in recovery stage, ready to "Go back to my life"

We all have massive stories to tell, whats most important is the love we have from our family.  What gets us through is love, determination, and the ability to let go of the panic.

Let me know if you need more advice, Bel Mckenna (welcome to read my posts)