Am I in denial?

I wasn't too upset either but my family and friends were devastated.

I was even ok with the mastectomy and SNB. By the way the needles for the ratioactive dye never hurt at all, I have had blood tests more painful than that. Waiting around for me 3 hours before surgery for the dye to get to where it was supposed to was the most annoying.

Sheer anger kept me going through those first few weeks and I kept trying to put a nice happy go lucky note on it all.

It was the second op I had the meltdown before. Yes my SNB turned out positive and I had to go in for the node clearance. All clear btw but I lost it. Bawled my eyes out in front of the doctors, bawled to hubby a whole day but when the surgery day came everyone was just so nice I was fine again.

Don't forget all the painkillers, tests etc do take their toll on mind and body so don't feel like you are being melodramatic if it happens to get overwhelming.

Accept any offers of help. People don't know what to do to try and make you feel better. My neighbours and parents cooked a few dinners which I did greatly appreciate. One neighbour even whipper snipped the garden and tidied up a bit. They were happy they could do something.