Hi Bel, I found each successive chemo got a little bit harder than the previous one - just more tired, less energy each time. I only had to have four so it was bearable. I had a few days where I just lay around reading and dozing, specially after number 3 & 4. Just take the rest that you need is all I can advise and be kind to yourself.
My husband wasn't that good at taking on the carer role either. I think with some men, they just don't know what they should be doing. It doesn't come naturally to them. I found I had to tell him quite specifically what needed to be done. It's not that they don't want to help or don't care - it's just that they have no clue about fulfilling the carer role. Perhaps make a short list each day of what is really essential and ask him to get those tasks completed. He may even feel happier when he has a clear set of goals to complete. I know it feels a bit hard to do when he is working but it's not as hard for him as having cancer is for you.
I think the other thing is that on chemo, your energy levels rise and fall. So some days when you're up and about and feeling ok, they see this and think things are getting back to normal, you can take over again, even though you might still be feeling very tired. I think you have to be direct about asking for what you need and not feel guitly about it. Perhaps us women are not always so good at that. I know I'm not.
I'm glad too that you are getting some outside help. It sounds like you feel a bit isolated where you are. Hang in there Bel, you'll get through this. Janet :)