Hi all, I was diagnosed with her2+ breast cancer in my right breast and 2 lymph nodes a few weeks back and started AC chemo last thursday (14/11/19) and my next round is on the 2/12/19. My wedding is on the 30/11 and I'm having a quandary about my hair. The cancer care team said my hair would be gone by my wedding day and I'm ok with that and will make plans for a wig for the day but I guess my question is, should I pre-emptively shave my head, assuming that it will definitely be falling out by then and commit to the wig or wait and see (get a wig in case but hold off until it actually starts to fall). As far as I can tell, wigs can be uncomfortable and itchy and I'm in brisbane where it is hot so I guess I don't want to have that added discomfort if I don't have to but, if my hair falls out on the day in large chunks I guess that could be hard to deal with at the last minute. I'd love to hear people's experiences with AC and hair falling out. And wigs. Oh, I should say I am not a very princessy bride so while I want to look nice on the day, it's not my major driving force. Thank you for any advice.

It was a lovely day. It was so nice to have the focus be on something other than cancer, even just for a day. The wig looked pretty natural although I took it off after a few hours because my head started to get sore.

Hi there, congratulations on your wedding, that’s lovely as is your very practical approach - your hair isn’t the most important thing on a day like that. I wore a wig right through summer, but in Melbourne, which can be just as hot as Brisbane but usually much less humid. I had a light synthetic wig, which never felt heavy and didn’t itch. It was also really easy to look after. The Melbourne supplier isn’t much good to you but I am sure there are good options in Brisbane. I would suggest look for a supplier for cancer and alopecia patients, because they know about sensitive scalps, how to adjust your wig when your hair starts to grow back and wearing a wig regularly, not just for a special event. Personally, I’d steer clear of real hair as such wigs are likely to be heavier therefore hotter (not to mention more expensive). Very best wishes for everything in the future.

If it was me I'd take a wait and see approach. For many people the period before and during your hair falling out can bring a great deal of scalp tenderness and discomfort. The last thing you want to be worrying about on the day is being uncomfortable, be it shoes, spanx or scalp! So I'd be prepared for any outcome. Have a gorgeous scarf on standby, a lovely hat, and a wig. There are wig hire places so you don't have to buy, simply rent for the occasion.The way I look at it is that in years to come you don't want to look at the photos and be reminded of a problem, but rather see the joy of the day. Do what feels good for you. Congratulations and mazel tov! Let us know what you decide. K xox

I agree with @kmakm to be ready for anything so you don't worry. I had caps and scarves and a wig all ready when I first went bald. I have lived in scarves since then, never taking to my expensive wig.I imagine you have lots to do and cope with in preparation for a wedding on top of starting chemo. You poor dear, life can be crazy sometimes can't it. I'm sure you will be beautiful whatever happens. I had my mum's funeral not long after I went bald on AC. I wore a scarf and people were lovely about it. I think a lot of coping is just having a positive attitude! I've had lots of compliments on how I look in scarves and a bit of makeup. I think people are surprised that you look healthy in cancer treatment!I've just checked my photos for the timing of my hair loss (I'm Her2 as well and had AC and then Paclitaxel).My hair held on quite a long time, I didn't shave it off till one day before three weeks after my first AC, so day 20. I think it started to look a bit thin a little before that but I attended a Look Good Feel Better session 17 days after my first AC with hair, I wasn't quite ready to brave the world with none! It was good to see others in the session bald as they were all beautiful and brave and I felt less alone about the transition.I had dose dense AC - fortnightly - so I'd had a second infusion 13 days after the first, my hair was looking thin day 18, I shaved it day 20. Good luck with it all!

What about considering a white lacy sort of hat with flowers in it? A couple of wisps of hair is better than none but you will want them short and neat not sparse and long. Family thought it was kind of cute and kept patting me on the head lol.

To shave for wedding or wait? | BCNA Online Network

38 Replies

Lythe
Member
6 years ago
And thanks for the advice for sleep everyone! It's nice to know it's not just me and to get some ideas to help
Lythe
Member
6 years ago
It was a lovely day. It was so nice to have the focus be on something other than cancer, even just for a day. The wig looked pretty natural although I took it off after a few hours because my head started to get sore.
PV123
Member
6 years ago
Hi Lythe

Congratulations, I hope you had a wonderful day. I have also been diagnosed with her2+ breast cancer. I used to have trouble sleeping at night. My friend suggested trying the tapping technique. I now use this whenever I am anxious or have trouble sleeping. The link below explains the technique and how it works.
https://www.thetappingsolution.com/tapping-101/
kmakm
Member
6 years ago
Dear @Lythe, I'm glad you don't have to worry about your hair tomorrow. I hope you have a glorious day. Make some beautiful memories! K xox
Blossom1961
Member
6 years ago
@Lythe Have a FABULOUS day!
JulieVT11
Member
6 years ago
@Lythe I’m sure you will look absolutely beautiful, hope you have the most wonderful day xx
Lythe
Member
6 years ago
Well, my hair made the decision for me. It started falling out on Wednesday so we shaved it all off. I have a wig for tomorrow and a bamboo turban and a scarf. It should be a great day! Thank you for all the good wishes.
Beaglemum
Member
6 years ago
Hi @Lythe just wanted to wish you well for tomorrow - you will look fab whatever you decide - this is my parents wedding anniversary to and they had a happy 55 year marriage before she passed away last year so i look at this as a lucky day and hopefully so will you. xx
Blossom1961
Member
6 years ago
Woohoo. Only three days to go. I hope everything goes well for your special day.
Caz1
Member
6 years ago
@Lythe I had trouble sleeping during AC , but due to the steroids.
My oncologist reduced the dose of the steroids which helped me sleep and feel more sane.

Good luck and congrats for your wedding!
xx

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To shave for wedding or wait?

38 Replies

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