Terrified of what lies ahead!
Hi, I was diagnosed with breast cancer on Thursday the 8th November. My eldest child finishes school this year and we were meant to be heading off to Europe on the 28th November for the trip of a lif...
Forum Discussion
Hi Cathy. You get through this bit, the worst bit, by literally taking it one day at a time, or one hour at a time if a day seems too much to contemplate. Break it down. The next hour, then the next one. Don't think any further ahead than that.
Most of us here know precisely how you feel. And I can assure you that you will get through. I was diagnosed 17 months after my sister died from breast cancer and had to go home and tell her young children, who I am now raising, that I had the same disease that killed their mother. I get your panic, despair and consumption by this diagnosis.
Things immediately get better when you have a treatment plan. So you just have to hang on until then. Do some deep breathing to start with. This calms the nervous system which is in absolute overdrive now. In through the nose, hold, and out through the mouth. I like to use 4-7-8, in for 4, hold for 7, out for 8. Do that five times.
A tip someone gave me here for when you're being overwhelmed with anxiety is to pat yourself on your legs and then your arms, saying this is me, I am here (forgive me if I get that wrong @Romla, @primek or @iserbrown, I can't recall who it was, sorry!). Another one is to stop, and take note of three things you can touch, three you can hear, and three that you can see.
These things take you out of your head. Mindfulness in a nutshell! If you are inclined, meditation is very helpful. I have a busy mind and don't find it easy but I was so desperate at the start that I gave it a try using the Headspace app on my phone and bizarrely, it helps.
However, probably the best thing at this time is distraction. For me it was stupid sitcoms, for others it's exercise, for some it's sitting close with friends who make you laugh.
Breast cancer puts a spanner in our lives and plans. One of the hardest things at diagnosis is having to surrender control. There's nothing for it, you just have to let go. It schools you in many things and you will emerge with a more profound understanding of yourself, and almost certainly you will never feel more loved. Europe will still be there when treatment is over.
You're the third person to come on here newly disgnosed in the last 24 hours. @Wonk and @BroniD are the others. We're all here to support each other but it's great to have someone to step through treatment at the same time as you. Check out what others have written in response to their threads.
So, finally after this rather long post (I'm sitting with my 12yo nephew while he busks!), I want to say welcome to the forum. I'm sorry that you find yourself here, but I hope you find it as helpful and supportive as I have. We're good for every question under the sun, a laugh, a rant, vent and a cry. Hang in there. The biggest of hugs, K xox
Most of us here know precisely how you feel. And I can assure you that you will get through. I was diagnosed 17 months after my sister died from breast cancer and had to go home and tell her young children, who I am now raising, that I had the same disease that killed their mother. I get your panic, despair and consumption by this diagnosis.
Things immediately get better when you have a treatment plan. So you just have to hang on until then. Do some deep breathing to start with. This calms the nervous system which is in absolute overdrive now. In through the nose, hold, and out through the mouth. I like to use 4-7-8, in for 4, hold for 7, out for 8. Do that five times.
A tip someone gave me here for when you're being overwhelmed with anxiety is to pat yourself on your legs and then your arms, saying this is me, I am here (forgive me if I get that wrong @Romla, @primek or @iserbrown, I can't recall who it was, sorry!). Another one is to stop, and take note of three things you can touch, three you can hear, and three that you can see.
These things take you out of your head. Mindfulness in a nutshell! If you are inclined, meditation is very helpful. I have a busy mind and don't find it easy but I was so desperate at the start that I gave it a try using the Headspace app on my phone and bizarrely, it helps.
However, probably the best thing at this time is distraction. For me it was stupid sitcoms, for others it's exercise, for some it's sitting close with friends who make you laugh.
Breast cancer puts a spanner in our lives and plans. One of the hardest things at diagnosis is having to surrender control. There's nothing for it, you just have to let go. It schools you in many things and you will emerge with a more profound understanding of yourself, and almost certainly you will never feel more loved. Europe will still be there when treatment is over.
You're the third person to come on here newly disgnosed in the last 24 hours. @Wonk and @BroniD are the others. We're all here to support each other but it's great to have someone to step through treatment at the same time as you. Check out what others have written in response to their threads.
So, finally after this rather long post (I'm sitting with my 12yo nephew while he busks!), I want to say welcome to the forum. I'm sorry that you find yourself here, but I hope you find it as helpful and supportive as I have. We're good for every question under the sun, a laugh, a rant, vent and a cry. Hang in there. The biggest of hugs, K xox