Struggling with Negative Emotions
Good morning, I am new to the forum so apologies if this subject has been discussed previously. I had a double mastectomy in March 2024. Breast Cancer is so prevalent in my family, but all other fam...
Forum Discussion
Sorry to see you here, @jconnolly4285 - I hope you are healing well from your surgery - sadly, it can take a while for the nerves & muscles to 'settle down' after surgery - if your pain & discomfort continues, definitely tell your BC Nurse and/or surgeon xx Some people get Tattoos to 'hide' the scarring & there are some fantastic ideas out there ....
I am so sorry to hear that you are feeling betrayed by some of your family & work place and can fully understand your emotions :( It has really hurt you xx I hope that you can regain some trust with your family and boss .... and that they fully understand that anything they are told, is in confidence, not for repetition. :(
As @iserbrown mentioned, please contact our Helpline, on 1800 4500 258 (Mon-Fri, work hours) to talk thru what has happened .... as dwelling on it will only upset you further. Suppressing your feelings may only add to your distress. :(
I'd also suggest that you listen to Charlotte Tottman's What you Don't Know, until you Do .... She is a specialist BC Counsellor - who has had a double mastectomy, so knows what you've been thru. After her own diagnosis, she found that her experiences had changed her previous 'understanding' of what BC patients went thru ..... you can read her 'story' below in the PDF. And also listen to her podcasts here - they are very easy to follow and I think they may help you on this unexpected journey xx
Start with No 13 (the first episode of the first series ...)
https://soundcloud.com/bcna/sets/what-you-dont-know-until-you
Everyone's 'breast cancer journey' is different - and weirdly, those who have mastectomies may recover quicker than those who've had lumpectomies! Maybe just try & concentrate on your own recovery & not ponder your rellie's recoveries from BC ... there are so many levels of complexity with anyone's diagnosis ... we can never really compare 'ours' with 'theirs'. :(
Try not to get ahead of yourself, too - and deal with stuff 'as it happens' - don't try & work out what 'may' happen. Just try & Keep yourself busy now ... doing things you love doing, as this disease mucks with your brain more than your body - so keeping it busy doing other stuff should prevent it 'taking over'! ... For me, it was getting out in my kayak, fishing for bream & flatties as often as I could - out there it is just you & your thoughts ..... and my Ukulele Group! They keep me very busy! ;) Maybe, look at trying something new, to refocus your energies ....
Take care & all the best for your ongoing treatments xx
I am so sorry to hear that you are feeling betrayed by some of your family & work place and can fully understand your emotions :( It has really hurt you xx I hope that you can regain some trust with your family and boss .... and that they fully understand that anything they are told, is in confidence, not for repetition. :(
As @iserbrown mentioned, please contact our Helpline, on 1800 4500 258 (Mon-Fri, work hours) to talk thru what has happened .... as dwelling on it will only upset you further. Suppressing your feelings may only add to your distress. :(
I'd also suggest that you listen to Charlotte Tottman's What you Don't Know, until you Do .... She is a specialist BC Counsellor - who has had a double mastectomy, so knows what you've been thru. After her own diagnosis, she found that her experiences had changed her previous 'understanding' of what BC patients went thru ..... you can read her 'story' below in the PDF. And also listen to her podcasts here - they are very easy to follow and I think they may help you on this unexpected journey xx
Start with No 13 (the first episode of the first series ...)
https://soundcloud.com/bcna/sets/what-you-dont-know-until-you
Everyone's 'breast cancer journey' is different - and weirdly, those who have mastectomies may recover quicker than those who've had lumpectomies! Maybe just try & concentrate on your own recovery & not ponder your rellie's recoveries from BC ... there are so many levels of complexity with anyone's diagnosis ... we can never really compare 'ours' with 'theirs'. :(
Try not to get ahead of yourself, too - and deal with stuff 'as it happens' - don't try & work out what 'may' happen. Just try & Keep yourself busy now ... doing things you love doing, as this disease mucks with your brain more than your body - so keeping it busy doing other stuff should prevent it 'taking over'! ... For me, it was getting out in my kayak, fishing for bream & flatties as often as I could - out there it is just you & your thoughts ..... and my Ukulele Group! They keep me very busy! ;) Maybe, look at trying something new, to refocus your energies ....
Take care & all the best for your ongoing treatments xx