Im alone and dont want to burden others

Megs04...I too am on my own...I have adult children...I can't say I know what you are going through...I don't walk in your shoes but i too ...and I'm sure everyone here often goes to bed thinking about what the future brings...we play these movies in our overactive brain...scenarios ....never good ones....I wake up in the morning and it starts again we have no one to turn over to and talk to...no one to just put their arm around you and say itll be ok....I try to keep busy .... catching up with friends...gardening..Walks with my dogs..but daily it pops back ... when I'm at work i have girls that ask me how I'm going and it gives me the chance to offload...but when I'm on my own....I too get sad and fearful...the ones i really want to talk to and give me a hug are my children....but i can't....i don't want them to know my fears...It is normal that you are feeling like this...its a very scary thing....I was diagnosed in Aug this year with IDC Stage 1 I've had 2 lumpectomies since ...just been called in to drain a seroma to get things sorted for my radiotherapy on 3rd jan.....funny but there are times I feel guilty for feeling the way i feel....I should be grateful...when there are so many girls (and guys) that are so much younger than me with ca much more advanced. I tell myself I'm 60 next year if I get 10 yrs out of this il be happy...and ofcourse if this ca is cured then there is no reason that i won't.....BUT... that little voice pops up and says "hey michele don't trust it...it could already be growing somewhere else"  
Anyway I hope you get through Christmas with this...i think its even harder this time if year....keep chatting to us girls....you may find your fears are just like ours....welcome to the club xxx