I’m so lost

It's so frightening to get the diagnosis and if you've got young kids...well...it's hard not to think the worst.  If you have a partner, relative or good friend who is clear-headed and you trust who can come to appointments with you, it makes it a bit easier.  I found so much went over my head or I forgot simply because I couldn't focus properly.  If you don't like your surgeon, ask your GP to refer you to another.  It's an important relationship and one in which it's essential that you have confidence.  Regarding the kids, my advice is not to keep secrets - they are way scarier than the truth - but make sure the information is age appropriate and let the older ones know that they can ask questions and get truthful answers.  Better that they come to you than fret because someone else has said something.  Have you been advised about a Breast Care nurse - it seems to be a bit hit or miss who has access to one but it may be worth enquiring as they can help you navigate the system.  Re: chemo - not something anyone would choose to do but you can get through it if you need to.  A few have bad side effects, some get through with minimal problems, most of us are somewhere in the middle - nothing like the movies.