I have newly being diagnosed with Breast Cancer,I feel so overwhelmd by it all.Told on Monday 11/07/2016 that I have Breast Cancer then I have appointment at the Hospital next Thursday 21/07/2016 to find out what date my operation to remove the lump with be, then 5/6 weeks radiation treatment after that. It is so hard to tell family & friends what is going on when I barely know myself. Next thursday cant come quick enough. I know I should take one day at a time but its very hard to take it all in when at the end of the day I feel so alone. I am so very scared & worried for my family. I know many hundreds,maybe thousands of women before me have treaded these paths but now its my turn and I just dont know which way to turn? Please any advice would be appreciated.

Please don't feel you are alone, there are lots of ladies here that will help with advise and kind words. There is lots of support available these days that I am sure someone else on here will tell you about. I had a mastectomy nearly 30 years ago so can't advise what's available now. Nothing really back then. Please don't worry about your family, you need to look after yourself. Things will work out, one day at a time. Julie

Hi there, welcome to the forum but I'm so sorry you have had to join us. It is so overwhelming in the early days when you don't know what to expect, there is the fear of the unknown and you do feel like you don't know where to turn. Telling people can be very hard as you have to deal with their reactions when you don't even know how to react yourself. There are no right or wrong ways of dealing with bc. I personally asked the boss to tell my staff at work and I posted on fb as I couldn't deal with doing it face to face. That worked for me. I called a family meeting on my way home from the doctors office to tell my family. You can't help your mind going into overload. Request a my journey kit from here or your breast care nurse. If you know what hospital you are going to, ring and ask for their breast care nurse. Be prepared that you won't really know your treatment options until you have had your surgery and pathology results. I was told I would need radiotherapy and was absolutely knocked for a six when after my surgery was told I would also need 6 months chemotherapy and 12 months of herceptin infusions as well. Write down any questions you have, as you can bet you will forget them when you get in with the doctor. Get someone you trust to come with you to the appointments. Not only does it help having company but they will remember things that you may forget. Accept all offers of help. I personally struggled to know what help I needed as I was so focused on just getting through, particularly chemo and others were wanting direction from me. It is going to be tough on you and your family but you will get through it. You are all entitled to counselling and that really does help. You will need to put yourself first, something that most us find very difficult to do, but it's they way it has to be. You will get through this! Definitely take each day at a time, very difficult to do in the early days until you know exactly what you are dealing with. Stay in contact on here. You will get amazing support from people who have been there done that. Hang in there. All the best. Karen xox

Welcome to the site, yep very overwhelming in the begining as Karen has said sometimes your treatment changes, as mine did . It is hard to take it, one day at a time, you will get there. I remember the early days and yes they are tough, this site is good as different people at different stages of treatment we understand how alone you can feel sometimes. I will not say stay strong as that used to piss me off, be kind to yourself, karen has given you good advice. Sending you a hug xxx

Thank you so much and yes its so unknown what will happen after surgery so its the waiting its the unknown its the everything but soooo appreciate your kind words :)

So appreciate your support and yes i'll except that hug :)

First Timer | BCNA Online Network

13 Replies

primek
Member
9 years ago
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Hope all went well with surgery appointment and you have a date for surgery. Know we are here to support you and help with any questions. Kath x
dmcook
Member
9 years ago
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Thank you Brenda :)
dmcook
Member
9 years ago
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Thank you
Brenda5
Member
9 years ago
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Take someone with you for all future appointments. With your mind in turmoil it is easy to miss things being said and take a notebook of questions to ask. Telling family is tough and surprisingly don't be aghast if some back away like cancer is some sort of contagious disease. It is tough on all but I think the quicker everyone knows the quicker they all figure out how to adjust and perhaps help you here and there.

Be prepared for the idiots who bring in some whiz bang natural "cure". We all cop them. Just thank them for their well meaning and leave it at that.

Just doing a bit of shopping or dropping in a quiche for dinner is welcomed. No it is unlikely you are going to die so rule out any thoughts on that score. Yes you will be under the weather here and there and have to spend far too much time in your eyes resting up and recovering. Its long, scary, tedious in appointments and absolutely boring staying mostly at home. Stock up on DVD movies and mini series are even better.
dmcook
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9 years ago
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Thank you :)
dmcook
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9 years ago
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Thank you so much Cath, I already feel a bit better just getting all these messages back. I was going to say you have no idea how better I feel but actually you do :)
adean
Member
9 years ago
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Hi there, breast cancer is shit, yes sorry that's the reality, there are crap days and days you just want yo be over. But above all you do get there I'm 4 years post diagnosis and I'm living and breathing. The side affects of medication and treatments have changed me and I will never be like the old me, but I like the new me and that's what you will do too, you will get there and you will make it. We are all here some of us new some of us oldies. Lol but most of all you can do it. Regards adean
socoda
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9 years ago
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Welcome. The next days waiting for your surgery date will be some of the slowest in your life. BUT once you do have your surgery date it is amazing how much that will focus you. You will then have something to aim for, and while it will certainly make the whole experience suddenly seem incredibly horrifyingly real it also gives you a goal. Telling family and friends is incredibly hard and I don't know of a way to tell people that you have been diagnosed in a gentle manner - I'm not actually sure that there is one! But having told them if they want to rally around you, let them. As frustrating as it is for you it is also incredibly hard for them to not be able to take some of your burden. Your breast care nurse (either associated with your hospital or through McGrath's) are an invaluable asset and can provide sooo much information, but also this site and the ladies who are on it are a sanity saver. I don't think I have seen a question go unanswered. Responses are always filled with wonderful personal information that you cannot get anywhere else. Wishing you all the best with your appointment, let us know your surgery date and how you are going. All the best Xx Cath
dmcook
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9 years ago
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So appreciate your support and yes i'll except that hug :)
dmcook
Member
9 years ago
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Thank you so much and yes its so unknown what will happen after surgery so its the waiting its the unknown its the everything but soooo appreciate your kind words :)