Hi, I got my test results back from 5 core samples last Thursday. Malignant. Infiltrating ductal carcinoma, 12mmx9mmx8mm. Grade 3 (T3, P3, M2). Positive ER (80%, 1-2). Negative PR and strong positive HER2 (3+).Today, Friday, a week later I saw the surgeon and he wants to do a lumpectomy, chemo and radiation. He says I will lose the size of a golf ball in my right breast, no reconstruction but it will be apparent. He's scheduled the surgery for two weeks from today! I only told my dad last night. I'm 52, single, no children. Haven't told friends yet as still processing. This seems rather quick to me! Before I commit to a year of chemo (he said) and radiation I'd like to lie in the sun somewhere warm in my bathers and say goodbye to my breast as I know it! I'm not ready to be "sick". I'd like to take a trail ride. My breasts aren't large and I always wished they were bigger growing up. But I am happy with them now. It seems so silly and vain. If I had cancer in my leg I think I wouldn't be as confused. I don't have a significant other. I know I'm not my breast but they are probably the only thing I am happy with about my body at this age. I know a lot of women go through a lot more and apologise for what must sound trivial by comparison.Should I take a couple more weeks to 'do' something - even tidy my flat above the main house or even change my sheets? I'd like to drive north ... fight or flight. But does this seem too quick to people?Thank you

@viking1 Welcome! Sorry you have found yourself here, it usually is a shock and whirlwind. 2 weeks isnt too soon, considering your diagnosis, you do need to get it taken out and get pathology done as that's more important and more definitive than the biopsies. That will determine exactly your plan. Its so so hard, as like all of us, it doesn't wait.Ive had it twice 2011, 2015 and due to recurrence I had a single mastectomy Feb this year and diep flap reconstruction, absolutely a tough decision. It took me a year after Chemo to come to the decision so I was lucky in that I was treated and had time to think about it. I haven't looked back, it's been a hard road, but I'm 2 years clear now and reconstructed and moving on with my life.Everything in my life came to a standstill, I was only 7 months into a new relationship and a single parent of 2 teenage kids, my whole world was torn apart, but somehow Ive come out the other side.There are so many wonderful ladies here to offer support, so hang in there, ask away, we'll help as best we can! Hugs Melinda xo

Life is super crazy when faced with these decisions ...i did take some time and made some private photos .. some clothed some not i chose frida khalo as my inspiration so... love mexico and dressesd with this in mind ..al the best Bright

I understand how you feel but a her2 cancer can be very fast growing so the sooner removed the sooner you start treatment. You will be keeping your breast but it will be different. I chose mastectomy and reconstruction and had 20 days to prepare. (Same type as you, my biopsy originally said grade 2 but once removed it was bigger and higher grade than biopsy) I held a farewell boobie party 2 days before my surgery. I just called everyone...or sent out via email / facebook. Sooo many people came. My party was called Dolly's parting. We all dressed up...I just wore underwear and a skirt lol...with the girls on show. Food was boob themed. I wrote a poem to my boobs. And took photos. Sounds silly but it was important to me to acknowledge them and my loss . I was 51 at diagnosis and chose bilateral with reconstruction.I understand your feeling of being rushed, we all feel like that at the beginning. But haste is important with a her2. I really can't stress this enough. Treatment now has fabulous outcomes. Pic is if my party. I hadn't slept for days beforehand. I handed out my bras for anyone not dressed up to wear.Take care. Kath x

@viking1 i just wanted the cancer out of me as soon as possible. I would have gone to theatre that moment if it had been an option & wss completely distraught having to wait 10 days knowing it was in me growing. We are all different & deal differently like @primek how cool was her party?? Talk to a Breast Care Nurse if you are feeling railroaded into something quicker than your ready for..

@viking1 perhaps ask your surgeon how long can this be delayed. Whenever I had a problem the breast care nurses were pretty good with advice. Generally my experience and what I have read and heard is treatment starts as soon as possible. I am fairly big breasted and the lumpectomy is not really that noticeable. As for disappearing my wish. Having cancer does not knock you out totally you can still function. Some ladies even continue working. Embrace the journey. We are not lucky to have cancer but gee we are so lucky to be treated hereI have nothing but respect and admiration for all the crew that looked after me.

Do I Need Time? First surgeon appoint today, surgery in 2 weeks!

53 Replies

primek
Member
9 years ago
I understand how you feel but a her2 cancer can be very fast growing so the sooner removed the sooner you start treatment. You will be keeping your breast but it will be different. I chose mastectomy and reconstruction and had 20 days to prepare. (Same type as you, my biopsy originally said grade 2 but once removed it was bigger and higher grade than biopsy) I held a farewell boobie party 2 days before my surgery. I just called everyone...or sent out via email / facebook. Sooo many people came. My party was called Dolly's parting. We all dressed up...I just wore underwear and a skirt lol...with the girls on show. Food was boob themed. I wrote a poem to my boobs. And took photos. Sounds silly but it was important to me to acknowledge them and my loss . I was 51 at diagnosis and chose bilateral with reconstruction.

I understand your feeling of being rushed, we all feel like that at the beginning. But haste is important with a her2. I really can't stress this enough. Treatment now has fabulous outcomes.

Pic is if my party. I hadn't slept for days beforehand. I handed out my bras for anyone not dressed up to wear.

Take care. Kath x
brightspace
Member
9 years ago
Life is super crazy when faced with these decisions ...i did take some time and made some private photos .. some clothed some not i chose frida khalo as my inspiration so... love mexico and dressesd with this in mind ..al the best Bright
melclarity
Member
9 years ago
@viking1 Welcome! Sorry you have found yourself here, it usually is a shock and whirlwind. 2 weeks isnt too soon, considering your diagnosis, you do need to get it taken out and get pathology done as that's more important and more definitive than the biopsies. That will determine exactly your plan. Its so so hard, as like all of us, it doesn't wait.

Ive had it twice 2011, 2015 and due to recurrence I had a single mastectomy Feb this year and diep flap reconstruction, absolutely a tough decision. It took me a year after Chemo to come to the decision so I was lucky in that I was treated and had time to think about it. I haven't looked back, it's been a hard road, but I'm 2 years clear now and reconstructed and moving on with my life.

Everything in my life came to a standstill, I was only 7 months into a new relationship and a single parent of 2 teenage kids, my whole world was torn apart, but somehow Ive come out the other side.

There are so many wonderful ladies here to offer support, so hang in there, ask away, we'll help as best we can! Hugs Melinda xo

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Do I Need Time? First surgeon appoint today, surgery in 2 weeks!

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