Dark days
Just diagnosed this month, 1.5.cm invasive tumour, plus 3mm by 3mm tumour I couldn't feel. I am 46, have had regular mammograms and ultrasounds for years due to lumpy, dense breasts. I self checked re...
Forum Discussion
Hi @ddon. I'm so sorry that you've joined us, but know that here you'll always find support. We get you and we've got you.
I want to hug you in sympathy for the hideous telling the kids moment. My sister-in-law, a very close aunt to my two children, died from a brain tumour in 2015. 10 months later my sister died from breast cancer. My husband and I are now raising her two children. The following year I was diagnosed. Telling my children, especially my sister's kids, that I had the disease that killed their mother, was hands down the hardest thing I've ever had to do. It was excruciating.
The good news is that kids are resilient, and they get used to stuff really quickly. Keep them informed, at the correct level of detail for their age, give them opportunities to ask questions and let them lead you. Some kids want to know a lot, others very little. I found it was easy to disappear into myself and for my youngest, this caused her worry as a couple of times she was a bit in the dark as to what was going on with my treatment.
Offer them access to counselling. They may not want it but sometimes a little push can be useful.
Other than that, keep it as normal as possible. Just because I was feeling unwell in bed didn't mean I couldn't yell out to do homework!
Your fear subsides once you get into treatment. It never really goes away though. A close brush with mortality changes you. It's a big adjustment, easier for some than others. Lean on your family and friends, accept help, keep exercising through treatment, and hang in there. Take everything one day at a time and be kind to yourself. And remember you're not alone. Big hug, K xox
I want to hug you in sympathy for the hideous telling the kids moment. My sister-in-law, a very close aunt to my two children, died from a brain tumour in 2015. 10 months later my sister died from breast cancer. My husband and I are now raising her two children. The following year I was diagnosed. Telling my children, especially my sister's kids, that I had the disease that killed their mother, was hands down the hardest thing I've ever had to do. It was excruciating.
The good news is that kids are resilient, and they get used to stuff really quickly. Keep them informed, at the correct level of detail for their age, give them opportunities to ask questions and let them lead you. Some kids want to know a lot, others very little. I found it was easy to disappear into myself and for my youngest, this caused her worry as a couple of times she was a bit in the dark as to what was going on with my treatment.
Offer them access to counselling. They may not want it but sometimes a little push can be useful.
Other than that, keep it as normal as possible. Just because I was feeling unwell in bed didn't mean I couldn't yell out to do homework!
Your fear subsides once you get into treatment. It never really goes away though. A close brush with mortality changes you. It's a big adjustment, easier for some than others. Lean on your family and friends, accept help, keep exercising through treatment, and hang in there. Take everything one day at a time and be kind to yourself. And remember you're not alone. Big hug, K xox