Call me CRANKY PANTS... a massive rant

Thank you Ladies both for your understanding and your advice as you are absolutely right and I honestly needed to hear that.

I had a.complete meltdown emotionally the other day and must admit it has taken this long for me to finally come back to reread what I wrote and everyones feedback and get my head in order.

You are all absolutely right. I should stop bottlong things in until that proverbial 'straw' as it is so stupid off me to keep it inside for so long. Not like I am a damn superwoman that will manage to get through this without revealing she is human.

And I know that work will survive. It will be a mess and it will be difficult for them and to be honest I have been sticking it out as I do genuonly care for a couple of colleagues and I know their lives will be a misery if I just leave this way with nobody to hand over what I do but I have now come to the point of realising it simply has to be that way and my allowing myself to get this run down and this ill right before chemo will destroy me and still they will be stuffed as there is not much I can do when the GM has not organised someone for me to train on time.

I get it and have turned a new leaf. Today and the few days I am there next week I am going to take it easy.

I must admit that I do not think I will ever get used to comments of strangers telling that those that get were meant to as some part of grand plan or rhag being given cancer is a good thing as it will show me just strong I am or teach me that I have to look after my self better. BUT I reckon I can keep that to a minimum as going forward I come first so stuff the idiots... I can always walk away... Who says I need to politely smile at dumb statements. Dumb me worrying about their feelings over my own - Time for me to put myself first and spend my time and energy on those that count, those that are supportive and helpfull and to simply walk away from dimwits.

Again thank you ... reading your comments really helped ????????

Jel.