First visit to Breast Cancer Clinic, after small red spot on nipple. Surgeon no 100% not cancer, we do not know what that is, never seen anything like it before? Come back in 6 weeks and if it is still there we will do a biopsy.Guess what? you have cancer, told by the brand new intern on his first day, after a 5 hour wait ......reminder him I was a nurse and on staff, so he said I will call the Surgeon. Surgery done, and oh we found another breast cancer, the aggressive one, so need to go back to surgery again this week. More 5 hour waits, and we got it all, no need for chemo, too small, radio now, then keep an eye on it! All good, see the Oncologist anyway just to get his opinion.... no need for chemo, may not help, all good, comes back 5 mins later, well lets try small dose to stop any cancer returning! You will not loose your hair and you are better to keep working! Monday working feeling great after first dose, no issues, Today Friday bald, in pain and every symptom waiting to go for weekly chemo, too sick to work, everyone knows I have cancer and chemo, yes I will get through this, no I am not angry, but once the world knows I find nurses praying for me, everyone has advice re diet, work, hair, well meaning but never thought the journey would be so up and down and never though hair loss would be so depressing and signalling to the world You have cancer, you are now a patient and we feel sorry for you! I can cope with the long term outcome but wonder if anyone else has had a confusing journey?

@"not keen on chemo" I am really sorry to hear your confusing journey! We are riding on a very bumpy roller coaster. I was diagnosed late last year from the day I felt a lump to now, it's been almost 5 months. I am still on the roller coaster and waiting for the big scary turn, hopefully after that I will be heading towards the end of the journey. I had lumpectomy removed 2 lumps soon I was diagnosed late last year. I was offered radiotherapy or single mastectomy based on my post op histology reports. I struggled to make decisions. I was referred to genetic testing and MRI as I was worried about my opposite breast. MRI found another lesion in my opposite breast and radiologists commented my breast were"nightmares ". I am booked for double mastectomy next Friday. I am a nurse as well. It's certainly feeling weird being a patient now. I had nipple delay procedure done yesterday. I had the nurse who looked after me when I had lumpectomy. She said she will request to look after me next Friday after my double mastectomy. A very kind nurse! All the best with your journey! Gentle hugs for you! xxx

@"not keen on chemo" Welcome!! I think there are plenty of people here with plenty of confusing stories yes!! My first diagnosis was 2011 and 2nd in 2015. I think ive seen it all in that time. One thing I learned was having had lumpectomies, biopsies, sentinel node biopsies, radiation and chemo is...I wouldnt do a biopsy again as every time I had one they were benign! so pain and suffering for nothing. Lumpectomy was the only way of getting definitive pathology for diagnosis. Its so hard then too when you get conflicting opinions on treatment, so its important to deal with just the Oncologist. I find it odd about the Chemo, he said you wont lose your hair? and you could work? what is your Regime? If you did just Taxol theres a good chance you may not lose your hair however on FEC or AC you absolutely would. I too found it confronting that part but had a great wig that nobody could tell. I was very ill on Chemo and could not work. Im now 16 months post and still suffering side effects, but I have a full head of hair and on my way LOL. I wore wigs for that reason, I so didnt want the attention (pity) from people, I just wanted to deal with it personally. hard to hide when I lost eyelashes and all hair all over my body, I really did look like that typical cancer patient and HATED it! I would ask a heap of questions so you can be ahead of what is going on and going to happen so that you will be able to cope a little better. People think they are helping and being well meaning, but they really aren't nobody gets it like we all do because we're all going through it. Its an amazing supportive community and a wealth of experience and knowledge and love!Keep talking, and sing out if there's anything that doesn't make sense that we can help with. Hugs Melinda xo

Hi! Sorry you've had to join us but we are all in this together and between us we will help you through the doldrums of it all. I can only imagine having a nursing background sets your mind off racing, information overload! Hopefully you've been through the formalities on this site and ordered your My Journey Kit and have a breast care nurse as your go to. There are other resources that are there for you to take advantage of, Look Good, Feel Better https://lgfb.org.au/ and the Otis Foundation. There are lots of posts and resources within this site that you will find helpful.As you would be well aware through nursing others we are all different in the way our bodies react to treatment. Wishing you well with your treatment and surgeries and hopefully it is not too bad!Take care

@"not keen on chemo". Half the problem is not being able to effectively hide what is going on. This disease is no more deadly than heart disease, but we can't disguise it. Which somehow makes us public property. Very annoying.

@ not keen on chemo what a rollercoaster. One day you are happily working the next day you have cancer. Your fine and then you are not. I think how are you supposed to trust your body ever again. No obvious symptons nothing. I tried to tell as few people as possible I had cancer. Suddenly I am treated differently. Same no hair sick limited in activity. Guess what a year on have hair, no cancer in my body and activity levels rising. It will get better.

breast cancer roller coaster | BCNA Online Network

48 Replies

Cassina
Member
9 years ago
just like my lunchroom mate who told me how I was getting fat!
LMK74
Member
9 years ago
Socoda, I second that.
socoda
Member
9 years ago
@Annedipa, your lunchroom woman sounds like a candidate for a bitchslap!!!!
Annedipa
Member
9 years ago
I get my hairy chin waxed every so often... I think its menopause that did it as i was fine before the chemopause. As for comments...yep people can be hurtful. I always wore a wig to work but as the hair grows back underneath it gets real hot and itchy. Couldnt wait any linger so i ditched the wig when my hair was about 2 to 3cm long. By that stage i think most of the office knew I'd had cancer so there was a few looks but no comments when i went in...until lunchtime..in the office tea room when one woman asked me if I'd had a hair cut. Well kind of i said...and before i could say any more she burst out laughing...loud...loud enough for the whole room to hear. Really i just wanted the floor to open up and swallow me then and there. But i just finished my lunch in silence...each day after that got easier and easier.
Cassina
Member
9 years ago
I could accept if Mentally ill patients make comments but this is from staff who should know better, I think it is that they forget how it comes across and we are super sensitive anyway
Brenda5
Member
9 years ago
My troubles are mostly in my chemo brain which you cant see. What idiotic stuff that comes out of my mouth though is a big tell. Its like I've gone back to being a kid again with no diplomacy at all. Mostly I just shut up in conversations now.
LMK74
Member
9 years ago
Socoda, if it gets worse I will try the cream. You made me laugh.
socoda
Member
9 years ago
Hey @LMK74, if your facial hair is worrying you there is a depilatory cream specially for the face put out by Nair which is excellent and for sensitive skin - just be careful about the amount of time you leave it on your face. I am fair skinned and have somehow managed to grow a couple of wonderfully thick 1/2 black, 1/2 white hairs at the corners of my mouth (must be my Cruella De Ville coming out!!) What the????? Anyway this cream works wonders. I work in a predominantly male field and a couple of years ago was asked whether I would support Movember - told the guys that without my cream I would actually be able to outgrow their mow's without even trying - bwahahahaha - loved the looks on their faces - priceless!! Xx
Jane_Elizabeth
Member
9 years ago
I successfully managed to keep bc confidential from my workplace (except the boss), and combined sick leave and annual leave to use up until after chemo. Then I realized....when I go back to work, everyone is going to know, because I didn't wear a wig, and no matter how much we kid ourselves, a beanie with no hair poking out is a bit of a giveaway, as are no eyebrows.lashes. So unfortunately on my first day back I had to face people who only realised what was happening when they saw me, hence lots of tears and shock (for them) and words of reassurance (from me). I would have been better off telling people before I came back, to let them get used to the idea before seeing me in person. Oh, well, next time.......hey no way, no next time! All the best!
LMK74
Member
9 years ago
Primek, does it eventually go away. How can it grow on the face but fall out every where else. Yes people can be rude, but in mental health facilities you kind of expect it. I've spent many a time in the psych ward with my brother so know what you mean.

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