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JJoy's avatar
JJoy
Member
15 years ago

Fed up!

Well ladies, I would bang my head against the wall, but the wall would probably break.  I am set for my next Chemo on Wednesday - and my oncologist wants me to start Herceptin.  The thing is, I had heart surgery as a child - so they did an ultrasound on the heart - the results were heart function of 45% - it has to be at least 50% for the Herceptin, so now there is a mad rush to test and re test, because another test showed 60% - I only found this out today - have already been up to the hospital to have the heart monitor put on for 24 hours - in the meantime I find we have to go to a major town (an hour and a half drive there) after I have the monitor removed tomorrow for another ultrasound on the heart (sigh) all this travelling! I get so tired - I have my mother-in-law coming for a visit and will arrive in about half an hour - I hope she realises we haven't time for 'sight seeing' - its so full on! I feel like I am about to explode! Yesterday was bad enough when I had an attack of the 'sads' - I am so sick of being prodded, poked, stuck with needles, nudged, fudged, X-Rayed until I glow in the dark..................am trying to take big deep breaths!  God grant me strength!

 

33 Replies

  • Yes Sandy I will be thinking of you - do you go to sleep through your chemo? I did for my first one and am hoping I shall be as relaxed this next tine around, I took crossword, sewing and reading to do but it just sat on my lap as I snored the place down!  x x x J

  • Oh Annie - how dare I winge about how far I have to travel then I read how far you have had to travel - whooa! I nearly fell off my chair!, I only have to go 1 and 1/2 hours to get there.......I feel very sheepish now! I bet you are in SO MANY ways glad you are over the chemo - at least I can have my chemo in my local (bush) hospital.  I will think of you tomorrow, and remind myself to pull my head in!  I have to go to another town for the radio therapy after the chemo - for 4 to 6 weeks (not looking forward to that, but they will put us up in accomodation) - I am having all the heart tests to find out if I am going to have Herceptin every three weeks for the next year - I am seriously thinking, I shall cross that bridge when I come to it.  I read some of the stories on here, and a lot of them give me hope, inspiration and like yours I think my distance thing isn't too bad - at least the big major town I go to is only 140+ k's, but apparently up until last year the locals here had to travel to Melbourne - over 300 k's so like I said, maybe I need to pull my head in!  I feel wonderfully inspired by you and I hope in all sincerity that every thing goes really well, you deserve it!  I send you heartfelt wishes and wonderful vibes x x x Josie

  • Hi Josie, wow with what you are going through i think you can be forgiven for an attack of the sads, i have them and my path seems so easy compared to you, keep your chin up and know my thoughts and prayers are with you all the way. Good luck with all your tests and i will be thinking of you on Wednesday when we both have to go through the chemo again.. Take care Sandy X

  • Hi Josie i know exactly how you feel. i have been having weekly chemo and have 3 and a half hours to travel there and 3 and a half back again. then have to organise someone to get my son to and from school.  i finished today yay!

     now i have herceptin 3 weekly and 6 and a half weeks of radiation plus scan tests and heart scans its crazy!!! But i didnt look at the whole picture just each treatment and each week at a time.

     the travelling is hard and draining and stressful the 2nd day i have to have a day in bed to catch up on the fatigue,but im trying my best to keep on top of it and keep looking that this is a means to and end and to enjoy a healthy cancer free life. 

     you will get through this i dont know where our strength comes from but is there. look forward to the good days and try to just go with the bad and let it all out.everyones journey is differant and we have to just do the best we can. sending you lots of strength annie xx

  • Hi Josie i know exactly how you feel. i have been having weekly chemo and have 3 and a half hours to travel there and 3 and a half back again. then have to organise someone to get my son to and from school.  i finished today yay!

     now i have herceptin 3 weekly and 6 and a half weeks of radiation plus scan tests and heart scans its crazy!!! But i didnt look at the whole picture just each treatment and each week at a time.

     the travelling is hard and draining and stressful the 2nd day i have to have a day in bed to catch up on the fatigue,but im trying my best to keep on top of it and keep looking that this is a means to and end and to enjoy a healthy cancer free life. 

     you will get through this i dont know where our strength comes from but is there. look forward to the good days and try to just go with the bad and let it all out.everyones journey is differant and we have to just do the best we can. sending you lots of strength annie xx