I am one of those people who has spent some days crying all day in the depths of despair. Mid-life, the last few years have been derailed by cancer diagnoses, cancer deaths, and tremendous disruption to my way of life as a result. My life has not panned out the way I thought it would. My cancer diagnosis did not interrupt a settled life filled with activities I enjoyed, a fulfilling career or successful business. So it's not been possible for me to defy cancer and be determined to not let it rob me. It has comprehensively changed my life and much of the time I have a stressful home as a result. It does impact on my recovery I'm sure, but there's nothing I can do about it. It is what it is and I just have to get on with it as best as I know how. I have big responsibilities as a result of cancer, and then the responsibility to myself to live as strong and as useful life as I can after my own diagnosis. And yes, there has been white hot rage and the black dog has arrived to lurk at my side. I have been taught that ignoring these emotions is not healthy. You have to go through it to come out the other side. Emotionally as well as physically, if you are lucky to have a good prognosis. I am doing my best.
And that is all any of us can do, our best. For some of us it will be doing our darndest to proceed with our lives as normally as possible. For others it will be accepting that the vicissitudes of treatment will throw us off track, and to attempt persevere, tears, anger and all. For some it's to keep doing what they've always done, for others it means giving up what they've loved and finding something new, and for me it's going to be finding new things to love as a way to find a way back to myself.
The pressure to be the 'good patient' is at times very intense. There is no right or wrong way to 'do cancer'. If tears and anger are part of your reaction, your treatment and recovery then you should be allowed to express that without shame or restriction. Like @AllyJay, here is where I let it all out. I'll never be able to convey how much it's helped.
