Forum Discussion
2 year all-clear, 2 year all-fear.
I've just had my second year check-up scans. It's always going to be so stressful.
I've had a range of worrying new symptoms pop up over the last couple of months while on my Tamoxifen break, so I'm worried something was there and has now domino down my left arm lymph nodes.
Taking a look at my scans, my layman eyes don't see a disaster. There are areas in the ultra that look like masses although to my memory they don't seem to have the blood flow activity to indicate tumors, however on the mammogram they radiate the margins of my crash site (... that's what I call my scar tissue, haha). And as much as I'd like to think hey, it's just age, it's just calcification, there's nothing like it in my other breast to establish that.
I know, I know, the cardinal rule of check-up scans is not to look at them before your consultation but as if have scans of inside my body in my possession and not look? Ha!
I never shook the lethargy. My doctor told me that it's actually a normal thing for cancer survivors to be chronically tired. There are no solutions; work while tired, exercise while tired, eat while tired, struggle to sleep, wake up tired, repeat. And everything always hurts. It's just my normal now to need painkillers to get through the day. 2 years on and my radiotherapy pain still hasn't gone away - and it's not just that it's not gone away, it hasn't "settled" the way I was hoping. It might be that during healing I just got lucky and clumps of nerves got together to make particular movements painful. I hurt every day and I needed to complain about it. It's been so long of waking up with pain and no energy and I don't complain anywhere. Sorry BCNA. You get my worst side.
I've refrained from posting quite a lot and just kept to the activity threads because I feel that my particular forum needs are a form of clutter for those in active treatment. A follow-up/aftercare category/life after category would be nice?
I've had a range of worrying new symptoms pop up over the last couple of months while on my Tamoxifen break, so I'm worried something was there and has now domino down my left arm lymph nodes.
Taking a look at my scans, my layman eyes don't see a disaster. There are areas in the ultra that look like masses although to my memory they don't seem to have the blood flow activity to indicate tumors, however on the mammogram they radiate the margins of my crash site (... that's what I call my scar tissue, haha). And as much as I'd like to think hey, it's just age, it's just calcification, there's nothing like it in my other breast to establish that.
I know, I know, the cardinal rule of check-up scans is not to look at them before your consultation but as if have scans of inside my body in my possession and not look? Ha!
I never shook the lethargy. My doctor told me that it's actually a normal thing for cancer survivors to be chronically tired. There are no solutions; work while tired, exercise while tired, eat while tired, struggle to sleep, wake up tired, repeat. And everything always hurts. It's just my normal now to need painkillers to get through the day. 2 years on and my radiotherapy pain still hasn't gone away - and it's not just that it's not gone away, it hasn't "settled" the way I was hoping. It might be that during healing I just got lucky and clumps of nerves got together to make particular movements painful. I hurt every day and I needed to complain about it. It's been so long of waking up with pain and no energy and I don't complain anywhere. Sorry BCNA. You get my worst side.
I've refrained from posting quite a lot and just kept to the activity threads because I feel that my particular forum needs are a form of clutter for those in active treatment. A follow-up/aftercare category/life after category would be nice?
67 Replies
- So now what? Sounds good.
- @"Patti J"
Well that is a narrow view of what you could possibly offer in support to newbies ....
Life is about taking the good the bad and the Sh*te and working it into a beautiful tapestry .... by being kind and sharing and having empathy for others not everyone gets that unfortunately.... - @SoldierCrab. When I phoned the Encore program manager because I felt that this program wasn't suitable for me, she told me that some managers don't like people with mets joining in because we scare the newbies.
- @"Patti J"
for those like yourself who are lifers with treatment so to speak it sucks also....
There are some of us who at the present time are LIFE after treatment ....
There are categories and groups for Mets ladies etc
What this would mean is that those of us who are presently finished active treatments (chemo & Rads).
We could have a category where we can vent and support each other without feeling like we are frightening the newbies..... It is hard enough when we are all first diagnosed to cope, without realising that we could/might have life long side effects from our treatments be it AI treatments or residual effects from RADS or Chemo....
BC is Shite and we all know it .... because the survival rate has gone up we now see more long term side effects in the survivors .... Are we happy to be alive and still with our families etc Hell Yes but it can be a real struggle for many.
I have a motto that "survivorship is hard a battle won every day..... "
@Marianne_BCNA
@Giovanna_BCNA
I like "Life after treatment - So Now What !!!"
But happy if it lets people understand in a heading what it is about. - I still have hope.
Hope that all will be well after I get this cancerous growth off my finger and a skin graft that I will be able to go fishing again.
Hope that my cardiologist when I see him for the first time will change my meds and give me something that works and doesn't sap my energy and have me dizzy all the time.
Hope that one day in the future at least half my pre cancer energy will return and stay with me.
Hope that my mind will return and I will have that willfulness again to do things I used to and maybe to try some new things as well. - What does life AFTER treatment mean????
- @InkPetal I read my scan report the other day while I was waiting at the dentist. I had had them done 2 weeks before so liked to think of there was anything worrying someone would of called me!
- I am so lucky that both the radiology practices I have used tell me the ultrasound results when they have finished (all good so far).
As for life after treatment, it really does suck with the constant insomnia and tiredness. I could even go back to bed before 10am, having got up at 7.30 am. But then I would lose the rest of the day and toss and turn all night again.
I am am happy with any of the suggested names. - Hey @InkPetal,
Lovely to see you back. Of course everyone looks at their scans. Not that we know what we are looking at but whatever.
Hugs xoxoxo
I like So Now What.... for the title of the thread also. - So now what
seems so apt!
