Having an Aha moment!

@Keeping_positive1 I too remind myself to keep my own pace and its ok to do so. I did start a volunteer job but I realised I don't want a weekly commitment anymore.  I have aging parents and a new grandson so I help them when I am able to. The beauty of this is I help them after I have taken care of myself first. 

I didn't have a defining aha moment either, but rather a series of realizations I had to change tracks, even after my active treatment, I still had to keep reminding myself not to go back to life in the fast lane.  I was so exhausted with my workplace commitments and In many ways the diagnosis of cancer was a relief!  It forced me to take a step back and give myself time to look after me. 

I actually took on a volunteer job mid this year, but I have just resigned.  I had committed to a certain day of the week, and was asked a number of times to change to another day if another volunteer was sick.  I obliged, twice, but then I said NO.  It was just becoming a reminder of what I went through when I was in paid work.  

So, sometimes I still get reminders of what I don't want to go through again, and that little light goes off to remind me I don't need to answer to a boss.

When people ask me what I do for a living, I simply say I am retired and I please myself what I do. :)  It's a great feeling. :)

Hi there, I think my aha moment was not a single moment but period of time during my active treatment. 

The  year before diagnosis I had my dad in hospital 11 times, my son was also extremely sick, my mum was struggling with memory (since confirmed early alzheimers) and I was suffering extreme burnout and had to retire from work. Then came the diagnosis!

I knew I had to change and I recalled a dear cousin who lost their battle with breast cancer had joined a group to help her get through it. 
I joined the same mediation group to help me relax and find peace. That group was with Patrea King's Quest for Life not for profit organisation. I think it saved my life.

At the time Patrea was doing nightly mediations for covid lockdown. I reached out to her and we exchanged some messages. I read Patrea's book Your Life Matters. It changed everything for me. It really resonated and Patrea's story was similar to mine in several ways. 

I was fed up with alot of things and I knew the only way forward was for me to change. I have and I am still changing and reaping the benefits of the new me. 

I still join Patrea King's Monday mediation group and am so grateful for my life.  I practice gratitude daily, walk 5/6 days a week, go to pilates one a week and practice mindfulness. I put myself first and while I still care for others I know I can't give from an empty bucket. So I make sure my bucket is full before I do anything else. I really enjoy simple things like morning coffee,  sunshine etc. 

My aha experience is something I am grateful for and don't forget.

I would have to say my aha moment was more of a journey than one “ moment” but it started early when I was diagnosed and overwhelmed with shock , I was having various scans and didn’t know if my cancer was stage 4 or not ( it turned out to be stage 2 , phew!) ,
I have always been a multi tasker who had trouble saying “ no” but I immediately started shedding responsibilities.
I was a board member of a voluntary organisation that had been taking up a lot of my time and when I tendered my resignation they said “ why don’t you take a 12 months period of leave “ . I said “ no” this is my decision”.
I learnt then that most people won’t argue with someone who has cancer.
I also cleared my work diary for 3 months ( I am semi retired so could go that) and ditched all engagements I felt were non essential.
As I progressed through treatment I found myself thinking “ how will this help my physical and mental well being” when considering what to do (or not.)
I started a diet and seeing an exercise physiologist and improved my physical state .
I am now 14 months post mastectomy and 3 months post DIEP reconstruction and continue to be a little bit selfish but also to cherish the good things  in my life and try not to sweat the unimportant things.