I just read your post and I have to say you are one tough lady. You must feel like you're on the BC merry go round and can't get off. I am so upset for you. But I think you have shown the little monster cells that they can't beat you. I've only had BC the once and that's enough for me. I decided to have a double mastectomy and reconstruction after 6 months of chemo. I could not stand the thought of it coming back in my other breast and going through chemo again. There is a lot of comments that we are brave but I've always thought that it's what we have to do, we have no choice. But Kek I really think you ARE brave after all you have been through especially knowing what to expect each time.
There is a fantastic group here called 'Breast Reconstruction' which has stories and photos from women who have gone down the reconstruction path in various procedures and their experiences with them. It's totally private and the posts can only be seen by the group's members. If you are interested to join and read and see photos of other ladies experiences, here's the link to the group page.
http://www.bcna.org.au/group/61026
Louise Turner (Louie) started the group, she is just the most generous and helpful lady and I have been a member since the beginning. I had the DIEP/TRAM flap procedure and so did Louie and you can read about ours and others experience with this.
I'm sending you lots of hugs Kek and I hope whatever your further journey is, it all goes well.
Love Janey xxx