Hi Jeska,
I feel for you and understand what you mean by not wanting to leave your mum out in any discussion. Maybe convince her that you like to know all the things the doctors had told her before in your absence for your peace of mind and catch up with the doctors or nurse before or after the appointment. Sometimes as a patient, we are not very focus and couldn't understand everything we are told. My daughter comes to my appointments most of the time because she said I got my treatment process or appointment dates wrong all the time. and had to correct me because at times i only listen to what I think I was told and not really listen.
Not much help but worth letting her know that it us good for you as her daughter to get first hand update and advice from the doctors in order to support her. She will understand and appreciate it. I didn't want my kids to know when I was first diagnosed because of fear too. I then told my daughter as she knew of my doctor appointment and then the other kids. I am glad I did.
All the best.
