What to do?!!

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Dazed
Dazed Member Posts: 7
edited October 2016 in Newly diagnosed
Morning all! Yes should be sleeping but too much on my mind. Diagnosed approx 5 weeks ago with bc & after lots of tests, scans & angst had a lumpectomy & sentinel node biopsy last week. Great!! But no.... Need more surgery but now back to the decision of re-excision or mastectomy & to top it off found out 2 days ago am pregnant. Confused much?!
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  • Rachaelb1976
    Rachaelb1976 Member Posts: 10
    edited March 2015
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    Hello there
    I'm 38 & 12 months on Saturday is my first "cancerversary" you will have a lot of thoughts going through your head & anxiety - my advice would be to take one day at a time, have you spoken to a breast care nurse? They are truly wonderful & a great resource, whatever your treatment plan please know that you can do this & you are stronger than you ever imagined xxx

    Take care
    Rach xo
  • Rachaelb1976
    Rachaelb1976 Member Posts: 10
    edited March 2015
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    Hello there
    I'm 38 & 12 months on Saturday is my first "cancerversary" you will have a lot of thoughts going through your head & anxiety - my advice would be to take one day at a time, have you spoken to a breast care nurse? They are truly wonderful & a great resource, whatever your treatment plan please know that you can do this & you are stronger than you ever imagined xxx

    Take care
    Rach xo
  • Dazed
    Dazed Member Posts: 7
    edited March 2015
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    Hi Rach Congratulations, I will message you when I have my first one too!!

    Thanks so much for the info.  I have just recently been in touch with the nurse & OMG, she is amazing.  We are meeting up tomorrow to work out a "plan".  There is so much going on... my oldest daughter Samantha (27) has a genetic disease & has cancer AGAIN (3rd time for her) & I found out this on the same day as me.  I also have Isabella (4) she is adorable but full on & some days it just feels like a bit too much and now the unexpected pregnancy, (I'm 46!).  I do have some great friends who say I'm really strong etc, but that's on the outside lol!

    Keep up the good work :-)

  • Dazed
    Dazed Member Posts: 7
    edited March 2015
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    Thanks Liz, am I young enough??!!  hahahaha will be joining soon :-)

    Cass xxx

  • Dazed
    Dazed Member Posts: 7
    edited March 2015
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    Thanks Liz, am I young enough??!!  hahahaha will be joining soon :-)

    Cass xxx

  • BecJ
    BecJ Member Posts: 37 ✭
    edited March 2015
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    Hi I'm sorry to hear how much your dealing with.
    I too have a very full plate and you just take each day at a time. Some will be good, some tiring, some emotional, some painful/sick and some all of the above.
    Being pregnant is big congratulations and whatever you need to do will be the right decision at that time. Don't second guess yourself to much.
    I too had a mascetomy without a choice and it's fine also. I'm happy that was right for me.
    I'm a single mum who lost my baby just before I was diagnosed and separated for my abusive husband also just before I was diagnosed. This was 10 mths ago and left me to care for our 2 and 3 year old.
    Chemo was tough physically and take any help cooking cleaning any people offer. Surgery tough also but not for as long, I am happy with surgery and radiotherapy as it didn't effect my mind as much. Which made finding ways around things with the kids better. Movies all cuddled on couch blankets and pop corn often. The kids just needed me to be with them even if it was not lots of fun etc.
    good luck and it will get better.
    I finish radiotherapy yesterday, some burns but other wise I feel great as only need an injection once a month to stop hormones and herceptin each 3 weeks I/v for a few hours at hospital. That's the quietest we have been for the 10months.
    Ps I was told at the start right off a year.
    Luv B
  • BecJ
    BecJ Member Posts: 37 ✭
    edited March 2015
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    Hi I'm sorry to hear how much your dealing with.
    I too have a very full plate and you just take each day at a time. Some will be good, some tiring, some emotional, some painful/sick and some all of the above.
    Being pregnant is big congratulations and whatever you need to do will be the right decision at that time. Don't second guess yourself to much.
    I too had a mascetomy without a choice and it's fine also. I'm happy that was right for me.
    I'm a single mum who lost my baby just before I was diagnosed and separated for my abusive husband also just before I was diagnosed. This was 10 mths ago and left me to care for our 2 and 3 year old.
    Chemo was tough physically and take any help cooking cleaning any people offer. Surgery tough also but not for as long, I am happy with surgery and radiotherapy as it didn't effect my mind as much. Which made finding ways around things with the kids better. Movies all cuddled on couch blankets and pop corn often. The kids just needed me to be with them even if it was not lots of fun etc.
    good luck and it will get better.
    I finish radiotherapy yesterday, some burns but other wise I feel great as only need an injection once a month to stop hormones and herceptin each 3 weeks I/v for a few hours at hospital. That's the quietest we have been for the 10months.
    Ps I was told at the start right off a year.
    Luv B
  • TonyaM
    TonyaM Member Posts: 2,836 ✭
    edited March 2015
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    What a dilemma-I can't even get my head around what life has just thrown you. No wonder you are dazed.Perhaps getting the pathology from your lumpectomy first may shed some light on your decision making?It seems you will need more surgery either way if margins aren't clear.I guess radiation is a big question mark if you are pregnant.Lots of questions to ask your bc nurse. I was 47 years old for my first breast cancer.I had a lumpectomy,full node clearance and radiation. 7 years later cancer came back in the same breast,same spot so had a mastectomy and chemo.Ask your doctor about the odds of it coming back.In my case,it was 8% after the lumpectomy.Both operations are similar painwise,recoverywise but a full node clearance under your arm is the harder op to get over(in my opinion). I hope you reach a comfortable decision soon -one that feels right for you. Sending many hugs,Tonya xx

  • wendyb
    wendyb Member Posts: 26 ✭
    edited March 2015
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    I am not sure what type of bc you have but I had dcis and was given choice of lumpectomy and radiation or mastectomy. I opted for a double mastectomy and reconstruction. Whilst that decision was hard I have no regrets. After the surgery I was not allowed to use my arms and if I had children at the time I would not have been able to lift them. I also had a good chance if the bec turning up in my other breast. To have that surgery with kids I think would be harder. I am now a proud mother of a 5.5 month old boy. Bottle feeding has had its advantages. Ask lots of questions from the nurses and surgeons about recurrence and being pregnant if you go through surgery etc. good luck and I hope all goes with with both your pregnancy and your diagnosis.
  • Dazed
    Dazed Member Posts: 7
    edited March 2015
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    OMG, you guys are amazing!!!  What life throws at us!

    Thanks to everyone for your comments, it really does help put things in perspective and I know will help my decision making a bit easier.  

    It has been suggested to me by someone to have the gene testing done or is this normally done anyway once diagnosed?  I havent been told too much about that.

    And with reconstruction, the surgeon has said he can do an implant reconstruction at the same time if I choose the mastectomy path.  Is that the best option?  I have been looking a pictures online and some of the reconstructions are fantastic!

     

  • wendyb
    wendyb Member Posts: 26 ✭
    edited March 2015
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    If you have a family history of cancer then I would recommend getting tested. I don't have the brca gene but a different one which I why I got regular screening. My partner and I also opted for pgd and ivf to ensure that I don't pass the gene down to our kids.
    I went private but the time from my first surgery (nipple sparing bilateral mastectomy and reconstruction) to the second surgery of replacing the tissue expanders with the silicon implants was only 4 months. I was pretty much back to normal after that period (my husband and I said that if someone told me I would be back to normal in less than 6 months we wouldn't have believed them). You do have a loss in strength and movement but that is all.
  • Dazed
    Dazed Member Posts: 7
    edited March 2015
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    I've been in contact with the gene testing place n have an appointment. They've indicated that I may be able to get it publicly as I worked it out that I'm the 5th generation of breast cancer in our family! Not sure why the pattern wasn't noticed before. So that being said, I've decided to terminate the pregnancy, go for the re-excision with chemo to follow, then when I get the results of the test if positive will have a double mastectomy & most likely have my ovaries removed as well, but if negative continue with chemo & then radiation, and enjoy my girls while I can xxx
  • Dazed
    Dazed Member Posts: 7
    edited March 2015
    Options
    I've been in contact with the gene testing place n have an appointment. They've indicated that I may be able to get it publicly as I worked it out that I'm the 5th generation of breast cancer in our family! Not sure why the pattern wasn't noticed before. So that being said, I've decided to terminate the pregnancy, go for the re-excision with chemo to follow, then when I get the results of the test if positive will have a double mastectomy & most likely have my ovaries removed as well, but if negative continue with chemo & then radiation, and enjoy my girls while I can xxx
  • ElizabethRose78
    ElizabethRose78 Member Posts: 28 ✭
    edited March 2015
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    Good luck with that all! These groups are great for the practical side of dealing with side effects of chemo and rads. I just finished 24 weeks of rads, about to have 5 weeks of chemo. I've been fortunate in that had income protection so been able to rest a lot and other than fatigue haven't had very bad side effects.
  • ElizabethRose78
    ElizabethRose78 Member Posts: 28 ✭
    edited March 2015
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    Good luck with that all! These groups are great for the practical side of dealing with side effects of chemo and rads. I just finished 24 weeks of rads, about to have 5 weeks of chemo. I've been fortunate in that had income protection so been able to rest a lot and other than fatigue haven't had very bad side effects.

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