Very dense breasts - Lumpectomy & radiation & tamoxifen

laurie123

Hi there, I haven't posted in a while.  Hope you all had a wonderful christmas and New Year. I've completed radiation and am now starting on tamoxifen.  
My cancer was 8mm and no node involvement, I had a lumpectomy and radiation.  I had to push for an MRI after surgery, prior to radiation, thanks to my breast care nurse and radiation oncologist for getting it happening for me.  Although the MRI thankfully didn't show any obvious areas of more cancer, it did show 75% para...something density. Resulting in the MRI being 'a difficult study'.  Now my brain is going around in circles with worry I made the wrong decision to have lumpectomy and radiation, rather than masectomy.  As from what I have read, high breast density can result in a woman being at higher risk of breast cancer. 
I did not know the extent of my breast density at the time of my surgery, as no MRI had been done. Hopefully taking tamoxifen helps reduce my density, and therefore my risk of recurrence. I think I am just tired and starting to feel the full moving forward 'what if's.  

Cath62

Hi @laurie123, it's normal to second guess our decisions, especially with this cancer stuff. We all wonder what if. I sure have thought these things.

Then I tell myself that I had the best doctors, best medical team I could get. These professionals spent years of study and practice in their field and I have to trust that between them all, I had the best treatment I could get.

Next time you see your dr have a chat about it or talk to your breast care nurse or gp about your cancer and treatment. 

Try to change the self talk so you don't stay with those thoughts. They just won't be helpful if you keep them with you. Get some rest, gentle walks, indulge in self care, hang out with friends or do things you really like to do. 

Best wishes 

laurie123

Thank you @Cath62 for your reply.  What you say makes perfect sense.  I am being my own worst enemy but I feel like my treatment was quite rushed, without the MRI and thorough look before my surgery was done.  So it literally only happened just before my radiation commenced (radiation was not going ahead if any obvious areas of concern needed biopsy), so it's only now I am stopping and re-assessing it all.  I am so scared of it coming back or another cancer, I am analysing my food and drinks and exercising like a crazy woman.  I am waiting to see a psychologist and a dietician, so hopefully they will help.  But right now I feel like I should have had them both off for more peace of mind for me.  It's early days, but if I cannot move forward feeling ok, I guess it's always something I could reconsider down the track, although radiation would have all been for nothing I guess 

arpie

@laurie123 ... I hope you had a good Xmas & New Year as well xx. 

I have dense breast tissue too and my Lobular wasn't picked up by either the Mammogram or the Ultrasound  ..... my GP found it by accident.  It is good you had an MRI as you have something 'comprehensive' that can be compared to anything else into the future. 

Was yours Lobular or a different BC?  Lobular is often the more difficult one to spot on the scans as it doesn't present as a lump (as such)  - more like 'strands' ....   but it usually also grows slower too .... 

We need to trust in our medical team & support staff for surgery options ..... How long ago was your surgery?  When is your next 'checkup' appointment with your surgeon?  Make a list of your queries & put them to them xx

But .... Try not to get ahead of yourself worrying about the 'what ifs' cos it will muck with your brain!    .... Can you chat with your BC Nurse or ring the helpline here to have a chat? 1800500258 ...

take care & all the best xx

laurie123

@arpie thank you - my checkups with surgeon and oncologist are in early April (6 months from my lumpectomy).  

Wow so lucky for your GP being on the ball and picking it up.  I had a similar situation.  Mine was lobular too - and like you, not picked up by the routine mammogram, found 'accidentally' on an ultrasound that my GP did on a whim, as I felt something wasn't quite right with my body (i thought menopause coming on).  So that is another reason I don't trust my body, or the scans!  It hides! I have my GP to thank for being so on the ball and with her intuition. 

Can I ask what surgery and treatment you had?  I'm glad I got my MRI too.  So I have a baseline now to compare to.  It showed some areas but targeted u/s showed nothing of concern.

laurie123

@arpie I just read your story on your profile.  Hope you are doing well now?  Hearing someone who had had a hiding lobular like I did, and same/similar treatment.
 

Cath62

It is good to see a psychologist. They really help you process all this BC because it all happens so fast, you mentally need time to catch up on it  all emotionally.

The dietitian will be great too.  I have a good diet of mostly vegetables and protein with few carbs. I don't eat sweets really as I don't really like them. I enjoy a glass of wine or a vodka. I have really cut alcohol down but I still have fun. 

Exercise is helpful too. I like to walk and do pilates. I don't think you need to exercise like crazy but it's helpful to do some exercise you enjoy. 

@arpie gave you some good advice. Big breaths. Take care

arpie

Hi @laurie123 - sadly, not long after, my GP moved to Melbourne & I haven't found another one who was as compassionate & attentive as her.   I am going fine ... the change to Anastrozole was the best choice for me (thank god!) and I will remain on it for as long as I can .... probably another 5 years.  Terrific that your GP found yours as well xx. My 'clear scans' were just 4 months prior to the GP finding it manually, so the Mammogram (and later Ultrasound) totally missed it, due to the dense breast tissue and the 'strand like' nature of the beast as well - tumours/lumps are easier to spot. 

So my Lobular was immediately under the nipple, so my surgeon removed my nipple, took out the Tumours & then (as that breast was a tad larger than the other one - of which I was totally unaware!) he took some of the remaining breast tissue to fill in the 'gap' before reattaching the nipple.  Later, I had 4 weeks of Rads.  My Oncs (medical and Rads) are amazed at how normal my breast looks and feels as sometimes the surgery can leave unsightly scars & Rads can 'cook' the breast, leaving the tissue a tad lumpy/hard as well.

My Surgeon does an US on me every time I see him, too.  I should be seeing him one more time as in mid Jan, it is 5 years since my surgery.

Before your check up in April - jump onto this link & download the 'tick box sheets' down the bottom of the page (the ones within the post are only examples ...) There is the Cancer Council booklet on BC there too. Print off the Tick Sheets, Fill them in & take them with you to your appointment - as they cover many areas of concern for us .... Even give THEM a copy for their records as well.    You sort of 'self assess' yourself!  
https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/21973/questions-to-ask-post-surgery-of-yourself-to-your-specialists-tick-sheets-self-assessment/p1

And as @Cath62 said - if you are really really sad or struggling emotionally - your BC nurse should be able to get you into some counselling - to give you tips on methods of coping with any anxiety xx

Take care and all the best with your continuing treatment 

laurie123

Thank you so much for the resources, I will def check it out.  I will also join the ILC group I see here.  Thank you again for sharing your experiences with me and helping me through this difficult time.  Have a great day