Scanxiety management

Hi All,
Back again for sage advice and wisdom. 
I have been doing okay. Survived my first term of teaching after 6 months away. 
The new issue is discovering how what were once routine procedures that didn’t bother me, now have me crying like a baby and hyperventilating. 
Scans I had last year during my BC treatment discovered polyps on my lungs - which was discussed at my first presurgical  BC appointment last August  but I conveniently forgot so had a total meltdown when the letter arrived in January announcing I was due for a lung scan 😳
so I went in for the CT and was completely shocked when , as the machine started up I just burst into tears. 
Got through it, told myself I was okay. 

Results came back reasonably clear. But (yay) they found polyps on my thyroid. 
Same issue during the ultrasound. Crying (very silently) trying desperately to reassure myself everything was ok. 

So next week I have to go in for a guided needle biopsy on my thyroid polyps  ( oh fucking joy) and I know I’m going to have trouble because my phantom boob still recoils at the memory of the damn painful core biopsy last July. And there’ll be the crying which just happens now. Beyond my control. 

I’m considering ( in lieu of getting rolling drunk) taking a travacalm before I go in. Not sure I have time to see a doctor for a script for anything stronger. 

Any advice?  😬. Before you say grounding techniques... things you can see , hear, etc.... everything reminded me I was in a hospital!!! Which didn’t help a bit... just triggered me more!!! 🤣🤫

maybe I’ll put a high vis coat on my dog.... take him in as my support 🧐


  • Jwrenn
    Jwrenn Member Posts: 144
    @Raich Can you do a Telehealth phone appointment to get a sedative, I think that’s still happening.
  • Zoffiel
    Zoffiel Member Posts: 3,373
    Yeah, take whatever seems reasonable (advice from personal experience. do no take Phenergan unless you are sure it won't turn you into a rolling drunk)
    I've got a counting program I use when I have to get into unpleasant machines or people want to stab me. Start counting backwards from 27, three second breaths in, three second breathes out for each number. Then from 26, then 25 etc. If you can hold it together, the program thing takes about 45 minutes. If you forget where you are up to, you have to start again.
    When I assume the required position,  I tell people not to talk to me. Some well meaning do-gooder usually fucks it up. But I start with good intentions. It has worked for me. So have drugs. Best of luck. Mxx 
  • arpie
    arpie Member Posts: 7,668
    Gosh you've been having a rough time of it @Raich xx  The girls have given some great advice .... I don't think they hand out 'Mother's Little Helper' anymore (Valium)?  

    take care & all the best for the biopsy & we've all got our fingers & toes crossed for good results xx

  • Cath62
    Cath62 Member Posts: 1,311
    Best wishes to you @Raich. I went through my first mammogram and ultrasound post treatment recently. I was a mess. I was ok until I got on the bed for the ultrasound and then I wept like I never have before. It was surreal. I am normally very logical so I even surprised myself. The girl doing the ultrasound didn't know what to do. It just ran its course and once I was back in the waiting room I had no more tears.  I take heart in the fact it gets easier as years pass. 
  • Locksley
    Locksley Member Posts: 938
    edited April 2021
    @Raich sending you hugs.  I am not far away from my first anniversary scans too so I hear all the things you are saying.  I will try grounding and counting too.  Ps.  Your cat looks lovely.
  • Raich
    Raich Member Posts: 114
    @Locksley, he’s a 5 month old fiend! But he’s a snugglebunny. Xxx