Survivor guilt

Queendonut Member Posts: 20
Feeling something this week I didn’t expect. Almost 2 years down the track from diagnosis and mastectomy I lost a close friend to the big C this week. Younger than me. We grew up together- families very close. Couldn’t believe how hard it impacted me- more than losing anyone before. After a few days I have come to the conclusion that I feel it is GUILT...why did I survive and she didn’t. `cancer sux. 


  • Queendonut
    Queendonut Member Posts: 20
    Thanks for your words- I guess the grieving was just so different with this loss. I felt lots of anger but with the realisation that much of this was that ‘misplaced’ guilt I have been able to feel calmer. I agree my friend would not want me to feel guilty. I guess I was just so surprised that this feeling was so overwhelming. 
  • primek
    primek Member Posts: 5,392
    edited July 2019
    Living in a smaller community I sadly hear of all those that have lost their fight. It is gut wrentching. Yes guilt but also fear if I am next. It's complex the emotions we feel and life seems so bloody unfair. I'm so sorry for your loss.

    GABBYG Member Posts: 6
    Totally understandable I have just lost my best friend to HER metastatic she survived 4 yrs but she certainly gave it her best shot. I didn't think I was feeling guilt at the time but then suddenly something came over me and I went into depression stage. It took a lot for  me to seek some guidance but I am feeling for you as it's a tough one. I don't deal with the word survivor very well either as I don't see myself as this