Introduction

RachelG

Hi there,

I have just been diagnosed with Stage 3, grade 3 triple negative breast cancer. It has been an overwhelming last couple of weeks and I am going to have scans next week to see if it has spread to other areas of my body. It has spread to my lymph nodes in my right arm. I am 39 and have a little four year old boy, it's all been a bit of a shock. I have been reading lots of stories from you lovely ladies. I have been told chemo will start up soon once I have seen the oncologist to shrink the tumours. I am nervous about how I will feel after this and whether I will be able to keep working. 
Rachel

Afraser

Welcome! You don't want to be here but there are many people who have shared your experience and will be happy to help wherever they can. Bit of a shock is a lovely understatement, most of us know those first few weeks of disbelief, fear and anxiety all too well. It helps immensely when you can have a plan of action. It also helps if you can take one thing at a time and try not to plan too far ahead - there are so many variations in treatment and so many different reactions,  it's hard to know what's what until you start. I worked right through chemo, so yes, it's quite possible but others find their side effects make that too hard. If you can, best to have a back up plan, just in case. Once you see your oncologist, you will have a better idea. Take a deep breath, others have been on this road before you and got through it. This is a good place to share your concerns, ask questions (no question is out of order!) and occasionally have a thorough spit about the circumstances! Here's to you, best wishes.

Melsie97

Hi Rachel and welcome to the site. 
I was 39 when I was diagnosed last year with HER2 positive Grade 3,Stage 3 breast cancer that had also spread to my lymph nodes. I had a Mastectomy and then Chemo and Radio.
I have 2 boys now aged 12 and10. 
To say this diagnosis is a shock is an understatement, however once you get into the swing of appointments, surgery, Chemo and Radiotherapy it all becomes a new norm.
I am almost 1 year post diagnosis, which has gone so fast. 
On this site, you'll find wonderful and supportive women with such great advice and support. 
If I can help at all, don't hesitate to ask. 
Melxx

LMK74

Hi Rachel and welcome. It's lots to take in at first and overwhelming. It does get better though. I was diagnosed end of January this year with er+ve invasive ductal carcinoma stage 3a grade 2 breast cancer. I did chemo first in the hope  to shrink my tumor to have lumpectomy. For me I had no response to chemo so had mastectomy in August and all lymph nodes taken. As afraser said there are so many variables when it comes to chemo and it's side  effects. Mostly I had fatigue and still do but no nausea at all. It's doable but sucks. I'm now just started radiation . It's a long road but everyone here is fantastic. One day at a time. All  the best.

Molly001

Hi Rachel, I'm also 39yo and was diagnosed early January. My kids were just 1 & 4 at diagnosis (now 2 & 5). I've had a mastectomy, chemo & radiotherapy and have just started on tamoxifen (hormone blockers) for 10 years. A lot of ladies work during treatment, but I chose not to so I could give my kids my best. Also, I'm a teacher, so it's an all or nothing kind of job, which is way too demanding for cancer treatment! I did a lot better than I expected with treatment and never missed a day dropping off & picking up my daughter to/from kindy. Only a handful of times I was too ill or exhausted to stay up for the whole day to tend to my kiddos. Everyone is different, though, and you will need to just see how you go with it all. Can I suggest you check with your super fund as to whether or not you have income protection insurance. I do, and they are paying me 75% of my normal wages whilst I'm not working. I'm hoping to go back to work next year. When I was first diagnosed I was scared for my kids and what might happen to them if I got really sick... or worse, but I now know that bc is so very treatable nowadays and my treatments have been fairly tollerable. Try to focus on one step at a time. I was advised this and it really, really helped me. Try not to imagine too far ahead. You can't know what the future holds, so just get yourself through each appointment, treatment etc and get well again!  I found my kids endlessly motivating to be tough, drag my butt out of bed and push on. Of course I've done my share of crying and swearing too. All the best for your tests. Waiting for those results is the worst. Post on here for ANYTHING you need. You'll get warm, honest, helpful responses. You got this!

[Deleted User]

Hi Rachel, all the best with your treatment. They will look after you well during chemo. x 

primek

Welcome Rachel. Some people can work. Others can not. You might need to look at iptions around that. I wasn't able to work on chemo as I was just too unwell. It's a shock at the soeed it all happens in the beginning but the soober it starts the better. Take care. Kath x

onemargie

Hi there Rachel Last year in may I was diagnosed with stage 2a grade 3 (3cm tumor) left breast triple neg bc aged 43. All scans clear and no lymph nodes involved. I'm negative for the gene though. I had 4 rounds of AC chemo and 4 rounds of paclitaxol fortnightly for 16 weeks. I had a mastectomy left side so I didn't have to have rads as well as chemo and then took the right one off - my choice 6 months later. I have two kids nearly 19 and 21 I'm a nurse and might have been able to work a few hours in the second week if my job wasn't so involved with the public and sick people so I chose not to work as my job was in general practice and being the middle of winter I just didn't want to catch anything and delay my treatment or worse end up in hospital. And to be honest I was pretty buggered most of the time so to be honest would not of been up to it.  You will have to see how you go with it and how you feel. Don't put too much pressure on yourself. And it depends on what type of job you do too. You can get a thing called chemo brain which fucked me up at times and felt like my head was up my arse

onemargie

Sorr y here's my full post. Hi there Rachel Last year in may I was diagnosed with stage 2a grade 3 (3cm tumor) left breast triple neg bc aged 43. All scans clear and no lymph nodes involved. I'm negative for the gene though. I had 4 rounds of AC chemo and 4 rounds of paclitaxol fortnightly for 16 weeks. I had a mastectomy left side so I didn't have to have rads as well as chemo and then took the right one off - my choice 6 months later. I have two kids nearly 19 and 21 I'm a nurse and might have been able to work a few hours in the second week if my job wasn't so involved with the public and sick people so I chose not to work as my job was in general practice and being the middle of winter I just didn't want to catch anything and delay my treatment or worse end up in hospital. And to be honest I was pretty buggered most of the time so to be honest would not of been up to it.  You will have to see how you go with it and how you feel. Don't put too much pressure on yourself. And it depends on what type of job you do too. You can get a thing called chemo brain which fucked me up at times and felt like my head was up my arse

onemargie

Hi there Rachel Last year in may I was diagnosed with stage 2a grade 3 (3cm tumor) left breast triple neg bc aged 43. All scans clear and no lymph nodes involved. I'm negative for the gene though. I had 4 rounds of AC chemo and 4 rounds of paclitaxol fortnightly for 16 weeks. I had a mastectomy left side so I didn't have to have rads as well as chemo and then took the right one off - my choice 6 months later. I have two kids nearly 19 and 21 I'm a nurse and might have been able to work a few hours in the second week if my job wasn't so involved with the public and sick people so I chose not to work as my job was in general practice and being the middle of winter I just didn't want to catch anything and delay my treatment or worse end up in hospital. And to be honest I was pretty buggered most of the time so to be honest would not of been up to it.  You will have to see how you go with it and how you feel. Don't put too much pressure on yourself. And it depends on what type of job you do too. You can get a thing called chemo brain which fucked me up at times and felt like my head was up my arse

onemargie

Hi there Rachel Last year in may I was diagnosed with stage 2a grade 3 (3cm tumor) left breast triple neg bc aged 43. All scans clear and no lymph nodes involved. I'm negative for the gene though. I had 4 rounds of AC chemo and 4 rounds of paclitaxol fortnightly for 16 weeks. I had a mastectomy left side so I didn't have to have rads as well as chemo and then took the right one off - my choice 6 months later. I have two kids nearly 19 and 21 I'm a nurse and might have been able to work a few hours in the second week if my job wasn't so involved with the public and sick people so I chose not to work as my job was in general practice and being the middle of winter I just didn't want to catch anything and delay my treatment or worse end up in hospital. And to be honest I was pretty buggered most of the time so to be honest would not of been up to it.  You will have to see how you go with it and how you feel. Don't put too much pressure on yourself. And it depends on what type of job you do too. You can get a thing called chemo brain which fucked me up at times and felt like my head was up my arse

onemargie

Sorry I kept stuffing this up!!! Here's the rest of my post!!! Or you might be able to work it depends like I said o how you feel with the treatment.  All of us on here would love you to simply carry on life as normal and not have any side effects. That would be awesome. But you need to be kind to yourself and listen to your body if you need too though ok. Feel free to PM me any time with any TNBC questions you might have. Happy to chat anytime. Margie. 

Zoffiel

You done, @onemargie? Bloody hell, I thought I was the only one with that problem

RachelG

Thanks so much ladies for all your helpful advice and tips on getting through this. It really helps to hear other people's stories and know that I am not alone xx

Jen79x

Hi Rachel 
I'm new too and also tnbc - I haven't got official staging yet I think I get that tomorow, but I started ac chemo just last Thursday its rough isn't it- you barely have time emotionally realise what has happened and then they through you in for all these tests to see if it's spread and then you have to wait for results - that was almost as bad as the initial diagnosis ! What are you having ? I had bone, ct Abdomen to shoulders , MRI boob, called back for ct on liver which showed lesion "probably begnign" then MRI liver due to the probably. Waiting and not knowing if had spread was terrifying - hope you get all clears straight away so you don't need to wait longer ! 

Molly 001 - what do you need to qualify for income protection - i have it on my super policy but I don't understand if I'm sick enough to get it !!

Thanks everyone for your advice so far
xx thanks Jen 

Molly001

@Jen79x