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humblevoice's avatar
humblevoice
Member
10 years ago

Lupus, CPTSD, Breast Cancer... Oh My!

Hi everyone thanks for having me here in the group. i have systemic lupus and have been living with it since i was 17 years old. i'm 35 now. I found out last week i have breast cancer from the doctor on the phone because he wasn't in... then i found out from another doctor that i have a "standard garden variety" breast cancer, then i found out that the fine needle aspirant result was compromised because the collectors of the sample damaged it with formalin. and i found out that i actually have triple negative grade 3 breast cancer... so it's been a bit of a rough week... i also got a msg from a girl from uni that i thought was my new best friend saying: "sending you love and light and postitive energy huni! who do i talk to at your placement you're not longer doing so I can do it instead?" then a friend i have been close to since grade 9 so 20 years say: "its facinating isn't it? i mean from a scientific perspective!" about my new diagnosis... 

anyway. i love dancing and singing and recently picked up the ukulele and guitar and i have 2 pet bunnies. i had a another bunny who is still my son in my heart... he died from a rare cancer and i couldnt save him. i'm still in grief of him since he left for the rainbow bridge 2 years ago. now it's my turn. 

i also adore weight training. i started powerlifting mid 2015 and was getting to the point where i could deadlift my own bodyweight (80kgs), and squat 60kgs and bench 35kgs... but now i will have to start again. I also love swimming and horse riding and badmington but don't do those enough...

have a very supportive and loving partner and his mum and my mum. but i havent told my mum yet as i dont want to upset her because she had breast cancer and although have been in remission for 18 years or so has been living in fear... my plan is slowly let her get used to the idea i may have it then to tell her after my surgery when i find out if the cancer has spread. then at least she won't need to wait for results and get stuffed around like i did.

i find out tuesday 1st march if it's spread to the lymphs or bones from all the tests last week and i suppose just go from there. 

thanks for reading and i wish everyone healing energy and a big ol hug :)

liz

young-women

33 Replies

  • humblevoice's avatar
    humblevoice
    Member
    10 years ago

    hi tanya, my surgery is wed (30th march), and i won't find out about the nodes till the week after. and thanks for the encouragement for weights i have been pretty anxious the last week and have been a bit slack and beating myself over the head for it. i wnated to get myself strong for the surgery... but well, too many blood tests and appointments have exhausted me... still i am hopeful of the future in terms of training... i know i will get back to it especially if all the treatments put me into remission.. fingers crossed. xoxoxoxo

  • Brenda5's avatar
    Brenda5
    Member
    10 years ago

    Oh that's fantastic news! The chemo will also flatten the benign ones on the liver. Double whammy and all gone!

  • humblevoice's avatar
    humblevoice
    Member
    10 years ago

    It was it really was michelle!! And yes i willllll suuurrrrviiiiiive this!!!! ?????????????????

  • Michelle_R's avatar
    Michelle_R
    Member
    10 years ago

    That is the best news you could get!  Now it can be on-with-treatment and knock this bc on the head!  I am so happy for you.  All the best with your surgery and chemo and rads - it is a long trip but there is a finish line - remember, one day at a time and you will get through this.  Big hug. Michelle x

     

  • humblevoice's avatar
    humblevoice
    Member
    10 years ago

    just wanted to say a bit big thank you for everyone who commented... you dont even know me yet you held me in your thoughts and prayers.... thank you for being my bc sisters. i got news on wed that the tumors in my liver are benign!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    so now i get lumpectamy surgery with removal of the main lymph node, then 6months of chemo then radiotherapy. and go from there... i am feeling a little too lucky for this to be real... so its still a bit surreal that i am going to get the best fighting chance i can get....

    <3

  • humblevoice's avatar
    humblevoice
    Member
    10 years ago

    hi leonie, thank you for saying this... you give me alot of hope. i am going to kick some ass too.... i'm glad your chemo went alright. i pray and hope for healing and love for you <3

  • Kaossquid's avatar
    Kaossquid
    Member
    10 years ago

    Chemo went well, honestly at the start of the journey I thought the chemo would be the worst part of all of this, and its certainly not nice, but if I really look back at my last 6 months I think the whole up front process (or nightmare) that you're currently in was the worst part of it for me, the waiting, the not knowing, the bad surprises... and I may yet get more along the way, but the chemo at least makes me feel like I'm kicking butt a little bit each time.  Hope you're holding strong, 

    Hugs

    Leonie