Hard words to say...
Firstly, in February 2013 I was diagnosed with Paget's Disease of the Nipple and had a partial mastectomy of the left breast, followed 2 weeks later by removal of 16 more lymph nodes from under my left arm. Chemo and radiation followed with treatment taking nearly 12 months, during which time due to the steroids and lack of activity I put on 18 kilos, of which I have only managed to lose 8 since.
Like most people I lost my hair - scalp, eyelashes, eyebrows, underarms, etc. and had problems with nerve pain and numbness in my feet and fingers.
Last week I discovered that an old friend was in town, a man I have always had a major crush on, and hadn't seen for 4 years.
We arranged to meet for dinner.
Then the panic set in...
How was I going to tell him what I had been through? How was he going to react to my extra weight? What was he going to think of my short, thin hair (I'd always had long hair)?
I spent the day slightly depressed, I couldn't decide what to wear, I didn't like the way my hair was sitting. I nearly cancelled several times. Even as I was walking to the restaurant I nearly kept walking.
I should not have worried, if he noticed the extra weight he had the good grace to not show it, commented he liked my hair. He was shocked when I told him that I had Breast Cancer and he said he was sorry for what had happened, and asked what treatment I had gone through, then looked at my chest and said "So....are they real?"
I burst out laughing, I then remembered why I had always been a little in love with this man.....he always knew how to make me feel better.
Moral of my story? There are going to be times that you find it hard to tell others, I only hope that they are as supportive as this friend was to me, and if given the chance maybe they will surprise you!
Comments
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Awh, Godbless you, such a sweet story. We are always so hard on ourselves and yet we all see the beauty in others. Yes, we need those moments of laughter. And you got to love having a bit of a crush, so Brigid Jones Diary, love it.
Im 51, single, have been for 8 years. The great thing about it is you never know when a little bit of excitement might sneak into your life.
Often when I least expect it, I get a smile, compliment and a guy stops and takes a second glance. Warms my heart, often that timely moment we need to boost our confidence.
You just hope you don't have something in your teeth or hair, haha.
Smiles to you ??
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Oh Janine, you brave thing you ! So proud of you going through with it, what a woman ! And what a lovely response from your friend, that shows true friendship and support. Isn't it lovely when your faith is restored in mankind (and womankind) You must be glowing with warmth of the soul after that nice dinner.
Sending you a super girl cuddle, Trace xxx
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