Mammogram

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Cook65
Cook65 Member Posts: 733
edited July 2015 in Health and wellbeing

Hi All,

It's coming up 5 weeks since I completed 14 months treatment. Today I went for my first mammogram since I was diagnosed in April 2014. I was anxious going to the appointment as I was scared that it was going to hurt as I have some lymphodeama. That breast was fine but it hurt like hell where my port is. After the mammogram as I was waiting for the ultrasound, the technician came out and asked me not to leave after the ultrasound. She asked where my last mammogram was, and as it so happens I had had it done privately across the road from the hopsital where I was having my tests today. They sent someone across the road to get them. I had the ultrasound and was again asked to wait. They came out and told me that they had found a "dense mass" in my left breast (the good one) and wantied to do further ultrasound. Because of having to make adjustments for my port, the mammogram wasn't that clear. So back in I went. The next thing the doctor came in and took over the ultrasound. Everybody kept telling me that it was nothing to worry about but the doctor asked me to bring in any previous mammograms I had had to compare. 

Again I was told that they didn't think it was anything to worry about and that they were being thorough. So why have I fallen apart? Why am I completely terrified? I can rationalise it in my head. It is what it is, if it is something I will deal with it, etc. But emotionally, I am completely terrified. I keep crying and am so anxious it's not funny. I have a two week wait before I see the surgeon next. OMG!!!! Just when you think things are easier and life is moving forward. I have completely gone back to how I felt when I was first diagnosed. What the hell is a dense mass? What does it all mean? My mind is just completely running wild. Karen.

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Comments

  • hooper65
    hooper65 Member Posts: 48
    edited July 2015
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    Karen I can't imagine how you are feeling ,  going through this already and then having to face all the  turmoil again.  Your head must be spinning.  All I can suggest is like the first time take it day by day,  no good trying to guess things,  only the tests will show.  I'm going through this for the first time,  just had a mastectomy waiting for my results for the next step. 

    You are allowed to feel,  scared,  sad,  angry whatever you want to feel.  This is a fantastic site to put it all out there and receive support and advice from strong,  brave,  inspirational women.  Hang in there Karen.  All the very best.  Sending you hugs and healing thoughts ????

  • NB
    NB Member Posts: 14
    edited July 2015
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    Karen, I'm so sorry you are having such a difficult time.  Your response is completely understandable.  A friend who has had cancer told me when I was diagnosed that there will never again be a headache or stomach pain that feels innocent after going through a cancer diagnosis - they were right.  Scans and tests are likely to be terrifying for a long time too. I can't help but wonder why they haven't told you if something is wrong.  I remember when I was diagnosed. I walked out of the radiology clinic at 12.30pm after my mammogram and ultrasound. By 3pm my GP was on the phone wanting me to come in that night.  A dense mass could be so many things and they are no doubt being so careful given your history.  I am no oncologist but it is hard to imagine a new cancer could have got hold in your "good" breast after you have been pummelled with chemo etc over the past 14 months.  If there is anything there it could surely only be very new.  So hard but hope you can try not to suffer over what hasn't happened and quite likely won't.  Hope you have someone supportive with you and can get some sleep.  Sending you love and best wishes. Xxxxxxx

  • lrb_03
    lrb_03 Member Posts: 1,267
    edited July 2015
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    Karen, I'm just going to agree with what the others have said. I'm only two months since diagnosis, so a long way to go. All I can say is that I think that I, too, would be reacting exactly as you have. Take it easy, and know that you're in my thoughts,

    Lyn

  • kazza4450
    kazza4450 Member Posts: 159
    edited July 2015
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    Hey Karen. Two weeks seems an awfully long time. I was originally seen on a Wednesday, referr al and ultrasound scan that day and mammagram. Back to doctors Thursday, biopsy on Friday, results back in the Monday. Admittedly I rang and pushed through to have my results asap, and the doctor agreed. 

    Si Im thinking two weeks seems too long. Is it possible to speak to breast care nurse, reception etcans keep asking for resuktsto be givento you. If specialist takes long time to get in, see your GP, who can ring and follow up results for you. 

    All the best, praying its all good xx

  • Cook65
    Cook65 Member Posts: 733
    edited July 2015
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    Hi Kazza, because it was just a normal scheduled follow up and I'm guessing that they didn't expect to find anything, this is just the way the appointments worked out. I'm thinking I might give the day oncology a ring and ask if there is anyway I can find out sooner as I'm a basket case. It was so much quicker for me first time around too, so they may even give me a call. Thanks for your support. Karen 

  • Cook65
    Cook65 Member Posts: 733
    edited July 2015
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    Thank you for your support. Unfortunately I know someone who was going through treatment at the same time as me who developed lung mets whilst finishing off herceptin. My head is just spinning non stop. I woke up in tears this morning. I just can't stop it. I'm off to work this morning, so I'm hoping I can get my mind to think of something else. 

  • Jane221
    Jane221 Member Posts: 1,195
    edited July 2015
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    Hi Karen, I'm so sorry to hear that you are feeling so distressed and think it would be a great idea in the first instance to call the day oncology unit and have a talk with them. My last mammogram and ultrasound were extremely nerve-wracking as they also did extra mammogram pictures and the ultrasound showed a dark spot in the good breast which completely freaked me out. However, the technician did say on the day it looked like a cyst, and this was later confirmed in my results. I was a mess waiting to hear, but also knew that my GP would be on the phone straight away if there was anything amiss, so tried to think about that instead - it wasn't easy. I was also able to get a copy of my results within 48 hours and although I'm not supposed to open them, I did (well, my husband did, I couldn't bear to look) and they confirmed a cyst.

    It's so hard going through this all the time and I can completely understand your fear and concern and truly hope that all is OK. Thinking of you. Jane xx  

  • Arleene
    Arleene Member Posts: 238
    edited July 2015
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    Hi Karen,

    I couldn't possibly imagine how you are feeling all I know is you have allways sent me such positive vibes when I've recieved messages from you whenever I've posted whatever I'm going through I hope everything is okay and I'm sending you heaps of Cyber Hugs and positive vibes if you want to vent you can vent to me if you like we are all in this together.

    Anitaxxx

  • Cook65
    Cook65 Member Posts: 733
    edited July 2015
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    I can't stand it anymore, so I called the day oncology unit. Unfortunately I can't get my appointment moved forward but they are going to get someone to look at the results and call me back. 13/8 is just too long to wait. I feel I'm being ridiculous as everyone has said don't worry but I can't control it. Hopefully I will hear back this afternoon. Fingers crossed that it's just me being a sook and nothing is wrong. Karen 

  • rowdy
    rowdy Member Posts: 1,165
    edited July 2015
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    Karen you are not a sook, all the unknown is terrible. I think I would be reacting the same way sometimes it is hard to control our emotions. You have had a long 14 months of treatment give yourself a break. Sending you positive vibes and hugsxx

  • Cook65
    Cook65 Member Posts: 733
    edited July 2015
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    The hospital didn't ring back so I guess no news is good news. I'm feeling a little calmer than I was. I don't feel like just crying constantly. To be honest I think I was in shock. I really didn't expect them to find anything bar the usual cysts. Hoping I will get some sleep tonight. Thanks for the comments and support. They really do help. Karen xox

  • Kazzi
    Kazzi Member Posts: 263
    edited July 2015
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    Hi Karen,

    So sorry to hear you're going through this. I can't imagine how you're feeling but know follow up mammograms are what I'll be facing once treatment finishes for me later this year. All the women have posted excellent comments. Hang in there. You can do this.

    Sending big cyber hugs your way,

    Karen xx

  • LorraineB
    LorraineB Member Posts: 85
    edited July 2015
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    Hi Karen, I am thinking of you.  I do hope you will news of your results very soon.  Lorraine

  • Hazel M
    Hazel M Member Posts: 708
    edited July 2015
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    Hi Karen, I have been offline for a little while, so just catching up. What a terrible time for you, I hope they get back to you soon, it's mental torture. I'm crossing everything for you to get good results and sending you big big cyber hugs, all the best, 

    Hazel xx

  • lisboy
    lisboy Member Posts: 91
    edited July 2015
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    Hi Karen

    so sorry to hear that you are going through this mental torture. Hopefully someone from the hospital will get back to you asap so that you know what you are dealing with. 

    Thinking of you and hoping for positive news

    Lisaxx