Waiting is the hardest part!

You get good at waiting after a while, still sucks though. Hoping yours is simple as and not too draining (pardon the pun.) Hugz XXXX

Hi Nessieanne,

Yes, waiting is the hardest part and in the meantime you have us here to keep you company along the way. It's such a relief to get news, any news, any crumb or snippet from the medicos to keep you as sane as possible. And making those decisions you keep putting off helps as well.

My surgery was on March 8th and my husband and I have just bitten the bullet and cancelled our dream wedding anniversary holiday to Europe. All this waiting gave us no guarantees that treatment would be finished in time, and our oncologist has already said he would provide us with the necessary paperwork for the travel insurance.

As sad as we are to be cancelling, it is a huge weight off our minds. No more wondering if we'll get the Oncotype DX results on time, hoping to dodge the chemo bullet. No more wondering if radiation treatment will start on time. And if it does, will I be well enough to travel? Too many ifs and buts. So much pressure is off now, the waiting doesn't seem so crucial and we can concentrate on just getting well again.

So while you are waiting, stay in touch on here, hang in there, and look after yourself.

All the best for the 14th.

Hugs  San-Dee

Hi nessieanne I am pretty new to all this as well. I had my surgery on 31 March. I am generally not good at waiting but quickly realising that there is a lot of that and a hell of a lot more to come. Try to be patient and relax as much as you can be be good to yourself and hubby. I am still waiting for test results. This really seems to be a one step and wait game. The women on this site are amazing and such a comfort. Read their stories, post how you feel, it all helps. I am amazed at the great community here. So glad I was directed here. 

The next week will go quickly. Like you I was in a hurry to get all the housework, cooking, shopping done before I went in. Now I have just sat in my pj's for the last week. And cried a lot. We can only be brave so long, give yourself permission to let go and let it out. Its a long road ahead. We are all here for each other. 

hugs, Jacqui

Sorry that you are 'joining' us under such circumstances. Those early days of waiting are hard. An emotional rollercoaster. I personally found one moment I was coping like a trooper, the next I would burst into tears. But that's ok. The surgery will give you a much clearer idea of what you are dealing with and the treatment that will follow. Until then it is just a waiting game. Like you, I read everything I could in the meantime, trying to filter out all the garbage. And I told all of my family and friends as I knew I would need their help and support.

Not everyone ends up with a drain in their armpit after removal of the sentinel nodes. I had 8 nodes removed and no drain. And they were all clear which was good news.

We are all here if you need to vent or ask questions. So many ladies here with so many different experiences, there will always be someone who can help out. I won't say 'stay strong' because, you know, some days it's ok not to be.

Best of luck on the 14th

x-S

Hi, Nessieanne,

Have you been told if they will do a sentinel node test?  They generally do this to see if it has got out of your breast via the lymph nodes.  I would ring and ask.  I've had two lumpectomies and finally a right breast mastectomy over February and March.  The surgeon did the first four nodes during the first operation, and thank God, they were clear.  However, the pain in the armpit area was considerable afterwards.  In your flurry of keeping yourself busy leading up to the operation, gather yourself the pillows necessary to sleep on your back for some weeks.  Sleeping on your side is incredibly painful and impossible.  I had just got to the stage of trying it in time for my mastectomy, so have slept on my side for one night since the first operation on twelfth of February.  It will be weeks before I can attempt it again, sadly.  A tri-pillow is an excellent aid to keeping you on your back.

Secondly, I found, as have many ladies, that sleep can be very broken, and like them I am still spending part of most nights in a recliner rocker, after I fail to return to sleep in my bed.  In fact this is being typed from my rocker in a warm dim room with my feet up, and I will soon put the chair back down and try to drift off again.  If you don't possess one, see if you can borrow one for a few weeks, as it is supportive, holds you comfortably in place semi-flat on your back, and gives you arm rests. With a low wattage bulb on, a rug over your knees and a heater going, it provides a warm, dim little cave to drift off in for two or three hours on a bad night.

Finally, you will you find that the seatbelt hurts your breast like hell on your way home from hospital.  Your husband will have to drive very carefully and avoid bumps, and you will need some sort of small, very soft cushion between you and the seatbelt, particularly if it is your right breast.  A friend who had gone through this told me to go and get a cheap and VERY soft teddy bear, as facing inwards to your body, it curves protectively around the breast.  I thought at first that she was kidding, but Winifred has turned out to be a godsend.  It gives me the giggles to be inserting my bear under the seatbelt, and I feel like a little kid, but you can clutch it to you to immobilise the breast going over railway lines and potholes that can't be avoided, and believe me, it helps a lot!  A small pillow will do the same job, but may be more inclined to slip.  I have grown very fond of Winifred over the past two months, as she helps me so much!

The best of lunch with the operation.  ??????

Dear Nessieanne

As they say....one day at a time. My best advice would be to use this forum as much as you can. I did not until just in the past week (a year after my surgery). I am sorry I did not seek the support here sooner. Above all, be kind to yourself!

Take care, Jenny

Hi Nessieannne,I know the waiting is horrible.  I had my lumpectomy on 3rd March & am waiting for radiation theraby to start (hopefully in 2 weeks).  It was in my lymph nodes but I didn't have any drains.  Just keep going one day at a time but remember there will be crying time too & not to beat yourself up for it like I did.  Sending you big hugs.

Paula XXX