Chemo brain - what are your experiences?

For me, a year out of chemo, it has become a "two steps forward, one step back and dance a little on the spot" thing.  I'm a librarian and words are my thing but they are often tantalisingly out of reach and my spelling has suffered badly.  Some things have disappeared into a black hole seemingly forever (anything to do with King Lear, a text I had to deal with when I first got back to work) is not in my retrievable memory at all.  In some ways, this is a good thing (ha ha!, I hear you laugh) because it means that I ALWAYS check anything to do with this.  I also try never to trust now that I KNOW something - I generally do know it but I feel better checking that I've got it right.  Going back to work terrified me and a lot of it was to do with fatigue and cognitive dysfunction. And I did make some blunders but nothing huge, thank goodness.  I recognise now that I went back too soon for me.  On my psych's advice, I started to better record what I was doing  whether it was written down or doing something mindfully. 

In the past, my notes were mostly for other people but now they are definitely for me and that can include names of things or people.  This has been a major learning curve and something that has been a bit difficult to accept.  I also have to be careful when I get too many interruptions, particularly if it is to solve problems, as my resilience is just not there.  I can easily become frazzled and start making mistakes myself particularly later in the day as I get tireder and things build up.  My boss was on leave for a few months and another person joined the team.  She's lovely but does not recognise the need for breaks (not in a mean way, but will keep asking questions about work) and I HAVE to have those breaks now to recharge.  Now that the weather has improved, I have started going for walks or just sitting outside sometimes during my break times - better for my health but really important for my ability to concentrate.  If all else fails, I have been known to take a few minutes longer in the loo - no-one bothers me there.

So, my advice for what it's worth... Go easy on yourself.  If you work with others, let them know if you feel you can.  Try to devise some strategies such as notes or mindfulness to help you get through memory lapses.  Insist on your breaks to recharge even if all you can do is walk to see someone rather than make a phone call.  Go easy on yourself.  Recognise those memory areas that have gone AWOL completely.  Keep a thesaurus tab open on your computer.  If things are getting too much, find something to do that will allow you to get time out on your anxiety and get it under control.  Did I say, go easy on yourself?