Hi Sorelle,
A stage IV diagnosis is devasting, I too have mets (in my liver). There are so many treatments available these days and new ones coming out all of the time that women (and men) are living for many, many years. I have coffee occasionally with a lady who has had mets for 12 years and she is still going strong. Secondary cancer has been living with me for nearly 3 years and I still do everything that I used to (work fulltime, travel overseas etc).
It will take time but the numbness, tears, fear will ease and the world will look better. We have to stay sick enough, long enough so we can be the recipients of the cure that I am sure is just around the corner. Best wishes