Dear @LAT
I haven’t any first hand experience of what you are facing but of one thing I am sure. Pain is pain. No-one becomes a finer, better person by enduring serious pain unnecessarily in my book. Relieving pain as much as possible does not mean you are weak, it means you want to live the best life you can. Your doctors will appreciate your wish not to
over medicate but will also want to help. Talk with them by all means but about the best means of pain relief, not about a moral judgement about perceived weakness. I hope you feel more comfortable very soon. Best wishes.