Just want to give you a big virtual hug Marianne. You are not normal. I find myself crying on and off like everyone else we are dealing with so much and our bodies are battle weary. I hope you get a new furbaby soon. Sometimes at the end of a day I will cuddle with my puppies in their beds (yes, I litterally get in their beds in the cupboard, cuddling witht them,and it is the peaceful most relaxing time away from reality or any stress in that moment). Pets can really reduce our anxiety and stress. Not sure if anyone here has already suggested it, but it is always worth talking to your GP or specialist about anti-depressants. I have been on them for many years and I find it helps me a lot by taking the edge off and helping me cope better. Hang in there petal, we are all here to support you. xxx