Thanks everyone it’s still a roller coaster some moments ok others spent crying on my bed. I have had appointment with a new psychologist are really want to feel better. News that my first grand child is arriving in August ( you are the first to hear this from me ) has given me a focus to get well mentally and physically by then. I have major issues understanding why people “kick” me when I am so low and they know that and then turn around and say they didn’t do anything I am the one at fault, I want to let it go just struggle to do so. Thanks for the support I appreciate it.