Life to me seems more magical too @Caz1. I can’t explain it, but I have different feelings towards things and places. So much better than feeling ‘whatever’.
I went on a flying fox too about 2 weeks ago. It was sprinkling and I was dirty with sand. Usually my nightmare scenario, but this time I didn’t care cos I was having so much fun.
And yes, there’s always that nagging little fear that it could be taken away. But just push it away, and continue having your fun
And you’re not a fraud in any way for calling yourself a survivor. Actually you’re not a survivor, you’re a thriver. Words are important so choose carefully 🙂. You beat this bas***d and now you’re thriving. Make sure you enjoy as much of it as you can.
And maybe talk to a counsellor about possible PTSD, especially around scan/test time ♥️