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rose's avatar
rose
Member
7 years ago

Coping with the 'new normal'

Hi all 

I'm grateful that I've gotten through invasive treatment and life has kind of gone back to normal, although I'm still working out my 'new normal'. I finished rads 6 week ago and have been on Tamoxifen for the last couple of weeks. I've been very tired, which I know could be an after effect of rads, and am also very nervous about the potential horrible side effects of Tamo. 

I've also been very depressed and seemingly small things set me off. I really don't care about my job anymore, which in a way is a good thing, as it means I no longer work 60 hour weeks. I'm only working a regular full-time load. But it's making me very depressed and I'm considering a career change, but don't think I have the energy to start a new job. 

But everyone - apart from my partner - seems to think I should be ok. I have to have a performance review with my boss next week and talk about my 'career goals'. I no longer have any! Not working 60 hours a week is it! No doubt not wanting to climb the ladder is going to go against me - and I've been told before that if I don't go for promotion, I'll eventually be sacked. Up or out. 

But I'm really tired of other people saying that I should be thankful for my supposedly fabulous job. A close friend also advised me to 'stop being so negative' about my work. Telling a depressed person to not be negative!! I know I should probably see a counsellor, but I don't have the energy to deal with all that emotion...

So, really, just a little vent to people who'll understand. Thanks all.

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