Very depressed

A BC diagnosis is a bomb shell. On top of that, having 3 young ones is a lot of work which can be tiring in itself. Tamoxifen (I have been on it for almost 18 months), takes a lot of getting used to - the side effects have now gone for me and probably took about six months.

Re: How will I get through this? The idea of being closely monitored by my surgeon and oncologist for the next 5 years terrifies me. Everything has changed and I want my old life back!...

I was told by a surgeon....that being closely monitored is a good thing, and that made sense to me. Yes it's a pain having to go to the hospital regularly, but we make it work. As for your old life back....we can never have that, but it will come good again if you let it. I found reading some good books (cancer books that is) very helpful.

Keep in mind that early detection means that your prognosis is good. After the initial shock, I took an approach that I was not going to let cancer get me. I got fit and that became my medication (I was 41). This also helped me adjust my mindset and has been immensely beneficial with all the surgeries I have had. The fear of the unknown is scary and I know it's not easy.

Also, try not to go down that path of questioning yourself....you will get lots of other people doing that for you. I too questioned whether maybe I drank too much wineon occasion over the course of my life, was it the deodorant, makeup, my mobile phone in my bra or stress. I have had lot's of 'so-called experts' put theories forward. This is a waste of time - you are female and this can just happen.

I have two expanders and one of them is giving me grief but has settled in the last week - they are not particularly nice - can't wait to get exchanged.

Happy to chat or help out if you have any other questions - this is a good site to be on.

Alex xx