The next step

Hi Peta

I had my lump out and a sentinel node biopsy on 6 Dec 2012. Same as you I had clear margins and no node involvement. I am about to have my 4th and last chemo cycle. The reason I had chemo was bc my cancer was grade 3 - agressive. Everyones experience is different, however I have had a good run. For me it was like having a bad flu. A week of staying home, sleeping and watching telly,then a week where I could go on perhaps an outing each day with an afternoon nap, and week three where I was almost back to normal. I found that week 3 was when I caught up on paying the bills and other chores. As a single person (no kids) I have had a family member stay with me for the first week and sometimes part of week 2. They have been fantastic and cooked me meals and made sure the washing was done and house in order. Nevertheless, it was also great to have my house back when they went home so I could stop feeling like a patient and lead a normal life for a week or so! My main symptoms were fatigue and the funny tasting mouth. Also a pattern of constipation and diarohea in the first week, but I have found this cna be managed with diet and coloxyl (to get things moving).

Hope you journey is as smooth as mine has been so far

Hey Peta

A big welcome to you and your family and it saddens me to know you have to join us. Thank you for making your profile public and not private.

You have already found some positives from what I have read so far. You have clear margins and no node involvement (that is a wonderful thing so starting running with that one). You have a beautiful family who will be there for you during your journey. You can look at them and be grateful that your cancer has been found and that there is something they can do to help you rid yourself of it and to get on and live the rest of your life well and happy with your family.

Another big positive is you have found BCNA and this website and you will find there is a lot of love and support right here for you. You will get to meet so many wonderful beautiful people as you travel through your journey.

I agree the waiting is a killer. I am very much like you and very proactive and have been that way through my whole journey as much as I was able to.

Use the waiting time you have to keep yourself busy. Cleaning, organising your house (if you are like me and it always needs that doing), rally up your support crew starting with hubby then family and then friends. Ask them if they will help out with cooking and cleaning etc. IF you should need it. Will they help with doing pickups and dropoffs for your littlies. Get hubby to look in to if he needs to take time off as sick leave, carers leave etc. if that is available. If you work try and put a plan in place should you not be able to work full time. If you pay the bills, have a list set out of what needs to be paid when and be organised with that as I did find I fell down with that a bit as sometimes I couldn't think clearly and hubby wasn't around to organise it for me. If you can organise an many direct debits for your payments as possible so it is one less thing you have to worry about. YOu can always go back to paying it the other way later when you are back on top of things.

Do you have a trauma insurance cover, if yes, see if you can claim on it.

Just things that are normal every day to day things that you think you may have to make other arrangements or need help with then jot it down so you can follow it up should you need help.

I found the only way I could cope with the waiting was to keep busy busy busy. Unfortunately though you will have to learn that this journey has a lot of waiting in it.

I hope that has helped you a little. If you haven't had to look for the positives before you will learn to now I should think, I definitely needed to. The main one is that you are still here to wake up every morning and be a part of your family.

Good luck, please stay in touch and ask away should you need to know anything at all.

Lots of love, Mich xoxo

Firstly welcome to this site.  There are so many women who will be able to support you on your journey.  What helped me prior to comnencing chemo (I was terrified of it as my body hates drugs) was the fat that "others had gone before me" and were living good lives.  Yes chemo is tough but it is doable.  Radiation is much easier but time consuming as you need to attend each day.  Always the unknown is frightening.  In a year's time you will be so knowledgeable about it all and you will be able to support others.  One day at a time.  If you can keep yourself busy doing the things that give you pleasure - Go For it.  This is Now time for you to think about YOU.  Yes I understand that you have little ones - they will survive this journey well if their mummy survives it well.  You have received  good news re clear margins and no lymph node involvement.  Take the good news and run with it.  I have learnt to deal with "What is IS" and look for all the good in what you have.  There are good stories to come out of chemo.  From my perspective I now have wonderful nails.  I know a lot of ladies can have trouble but I must have done the right thing.  I did have the "frozen glove" treatment during chemo.  It was tough but it did pay off.  All the very best to you and sending you love and strength. XLeonie