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NarelleD's avatar
NarelleD
Member
12 years ago

Telling the Kids

So yesterday afternoon we sat down with the kids and told them about the bc.

It seemed to go straight over my daughter's head however I have given her the book "What is happening to my mummy?"  My stepson on the other hand sat there taking it in but not quite understanding.

This morning I did a check in with both the kids.  My daughter seems to still not be too phased with it as yet but my stepson had a couple of questions. (a) Will he be still living with us? (b) Will I die?

My response was pretty simple, as long as he wants to continue the living arrangements I want him with us and hopefully I won't die as we have caught the bc whilst it is still in the breast.  When I go for my op this week the doctors are going to take out the bad stuff and some of the good stuff to make sure.  Then the chemo and radiation will ensure that anything left is killed off.  He seems to be coping ok with these answers.  I also made sure that he realised that as we have been in each others lives for so long, I have been in his life since he was 2.5 yrs old, that I felt like he was one of my kids and that I want to see him, just like I do with my daughter & son, grow up and have kids of his own.

7 Replies

  • Mia1965's avatar
    Mia1965
    Member
    12 years ago

    Hi Narelle,

    Yes I remember the 'Mummy's Got Cancer' talk vividly. My eldest started to cry and hugged me straight away. My son tried to not show any emotion and my baby asked me " Does that mean you are going to die Mummy?" I tried to reassure her, but because the information was over her head even in simple terms, she had trouble with the answer, and let's face it, so did I!!!. I found out later on, that the kids were just in shock obviously and it took some time to just sink in and analyse. Talking to friends and amongst themselves helped each other tremendously. Of course when they are so young it must be even more difficult.  Good luck with your family darl and your treatment too. Take care Always XXX Mia.

  • Rosanna's avatar
    Rosanna
    Member
    12 years ago

    Narelle

    Sometimes I found talked to the kids is way easier to talk to adult.  It's good to give the a correct and clear picture what was going on, and what will going to be.  They loved sharing and staying with you.  Give them a correct message, you are doing very good, let them know you need them, physically help and spiritually pray as well.  You'll be fine. 

    Take care

    Rosanna

  • NarelleD's avatar
    NarelleD
    Member
    12 years ago

    Hi Anna,

    Thanks for the support.  I must say stepson has been very clingy today.  It still seems to be going over my daughter's head but I have her reading the book so hopefully it is slowly sinking in.

    Narelle

  • AnnaB's avatar
    AnnaB
    Member
    12 years ago

    Narelle

    I have adult step children and breaking the news to them was bad enough.  I can't imagine having the conversations you are currently having.  Sounds like you have done a great job.  I don't have anything useful to add I just wanted to say well done and I'll be thinking of you through your treatments.

    Anna