Secondary bone cancer

I don't have IBC but like you was diagnosed with breast cancer and within a week found out I had widespread bony mets. A huge shock, so much that I spent every second of the day looking forward to it ending so I could forget everything while I was asleep.

Had mastectomy and total axillary clearance, radiotherapy to bony bits that posed a problem - one close to spinal cord and one in hip that was likely to fracture - then Taxol (and Avastin on a trial).

Every now and then whatever treatment I'm on stops working and I try a new one, there are heaps of treatments to try. I'm now on Xeloda, an oral chemo agent.

I am now 5 years out, and can say you kind of get used to the uncertainty. I can definitely say that the past five years have in no way been the unhappiest years of my life. I've had lots of fun, and while a bit tired, continue to work at a fairly high level job 4 days a week, which to me is important. I know other people have other priorities, but whatever works for you!

The internal thoughts that allow people to cope in such a dastardly situtation vary widely. I've done lots of reading! For me what works best is to tell myself (and others) that I will be able to cope with whatever life throws at me, and feel proud about that.

So when I go for a scan or result, I try not to rely on a 'good', ie no progression of my disease, outcome. If this is the case, that's great, but rather than put all my psychological eggs in one basket, I tell myself that I don't need a good result to feel OK, and that I will cope with whatever result I am given.

My cancer is yet to spread to other organs, so I suspect this will be another great challenge. But I'm fairly confident I'll be distressed for a while, and then settle into the new 'normal'.

Don't know what will work for you but offer this strategy as an option.

Thinking of you

Kerri