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Kim_R's avatar
Kim_R
Member
10 years ago

Scared to look!

I felt a lump in my left breast while doing my usual irregular breast check in the shower, 10th June. I knew what it was straight away, how the hell did that thing grow so big with out me noticing, 2.3cm! My husband considers himself a boob man but this time he really slipped up. I had surgery for stage 3 invasive breast cancer on 15th July, it all happened so quickly for which I am thankful for but you all know the feeling. I found telling people the worst, saying word Cancer makes it all too real. I am lucky I have a fantastic family and group of casserole baring friends (my mum has moved in to look after me so I am spoilt). My mum is looking after everybody, we live on a farm so I have men for morning tea and lunch. My son is on his gap year he had plans but decided to stay home and work instead, it is great that he is here (I am sad that his plans were changed for me but I am so glad that he is here, he was teaching me the guitar until the chemo started than the oncology nurse stopped that because I have to report back on my finger sensations. Just another little something put in my way.). My daughter is at uni and has been home a lot but she knows I am looked after and most of the time I am up beat about it all ( even though I feel like this is happening to some one else) and I have kept them all informed, we are a family of cancer experts! Who would have thought that four months ago? I had my first of four chemo TC treatments, my hair fell out on day 12 (a few tuffs here and there left). I will have radiation 25 sessions than tamoxifen for 10 years. I am hoping to finish treatments by the end of December. I had very low neutrophils 0.1 on day 8 I was scared that this might holed up the process. I have been in hibernation for two weeks, keeping away from germs. I am well so far. I have the most amazing McGarth Breast Nurse who is always there went I need info, advise, a laugh and I thank God for her, because I do fall apart sometimes. Take care all.

8 Replies

  • HIT's avatar
    HIT
    Member
    10 years ago

    Thanks Kim  hey maybe the first breast surgeon has had chemo hey - can't feel a thing!!!  Glad you found your Professor.  And I am only having ups from now on, downs are banned.  My husband checks my boobs now, very enthusiastically I must say, but he can't find the ribs there to massage the lymphs - fingers to big maybe.

    Pam

  • Kim_R's avatar
    Kim_R
    Member
    10 years ago

    hello Pam, I spread the word too, 2 friends have had mammograms since my diagnoses, if it helps spread the word I do not mind being the poster girl in our community. I did not know about breast checking laying down but in goes to reason that tissue would be more relaxed. Poor you when it comes to lumps size does matter. In hind sight my bra wasn't fitting properly since March but i thought I was just getting fatter! I think there really needs to be more education on self checking and awareness. I had a bad experience with the assigned surgeon at Breast screen feeling and telling me the lump felt like 4cm and lymph nodes felt enlarged even though the scans said 2.3cm and nodes looked normal. He advised mastectomy and removal of nodes!!! After consulting my GP he suggested I went to a specialist surgeon. I found Professor Hughes, he was wonderful, I love that man, he organised another ultra sound straight away as we had traveled from the country, it was a Friday, he operated on Wednesday, sentinel lymph was clear with first pathology but later it was found to have 1% positive so hence chemo & radio & tamoxifen. I hope your treatment is successful, wish you well. it is up & down it but seems you have had your share of downs.   

  • HIT's avatar
    HIT
    Member
    10 years ago

    Hello Kim  Hope all is still going well.  The :found the lump while checking your breasts in the shower"; struck a cord with me.  I have made it my goal in life to tell as many women as possible to NOT TO CHECK YOUR BOOBS STANDING UP!!  I'm 55yrs and do remember that we were taught to do that.  Olivia Newton John also did some adds I think.  I found my lump when my boob started poking the wrong way.  Even when I knew it was there I couldnt feel it standing up.  U/S said it was 2.6cm,  mammo 3.2 cm- 1wk 2 days later surgery found a 4.5cm lump with lymph nodes cancerous at 3 x 1cm + 1 x 2cm, clumped = a 5cm lump in the lymphs!!   All missed... but on the good side a friend checked her boobs laying down a couple of week after my diog, and found a large lump, luckily it was a cyst, but made me feel good.

    Pam

  • Kim_R's avatar
    Kim_R
    Member
    10 years ago

    Thank you for the kind words. I know I am not alone.

  • Kim_R's avatar
    Kim_R
    Member
    10 years ago

    Best of luck to you to. I worry about the kids and disrupting their lives. But This is life to and far to real sometimes I hope I am leading by example in resilience. There is so many of us out there going though the same journey, but not alone.

  • Anonymous's avatar
    Anonymous
    Not applicable
    10 years ago

    Hi Kim, it is like being in a bad dream when you find a lump, and doesn't seem real when you get your diagnosis. I'm so glad for you that have good family and friends around you during this time. I hope that your treatment passes quickly for you. Take care, Trace ??????

  • Marlee's avatar
    Marlee
    Member
    10 years ago

    Hi

    i found a lump in July and had the exact same thought - how did I miss that before :( I was on holidays 

    mine felt about 2cm but MRI shows it's about 5cm. I'm  having chemo first, then surgery

    i have a son who is on extended gap years Lol and my daughter is in year 12, I feel really bad it's so disruptive for her but she is a resilient strong person. I have kept my kids really informed and this helps them a lot.

    i started chemo have my next session next week, my hair fell it Day 14 and so had it shaved

    its a roller coaster !!!

    Best of luck for your treatments going forward :)