Hey luvy, you seem so down. Reconstruction decisions can be incredibly difficult. One of the main things that have emerged as a top bit of advice during my own journey is to have the right plastic surgeon.
It sounds like you are not too happy with the one you have seen. Perhaps try a second and third opinion. You might be surprised and a different plastic surgeon might offer you a different choice.
If you are worried about the price, you could try finding a surgeon in the public system.
You are a member of the recon group, maybe try posting there to find others who are in your area and who might also be able to help with your decisions. Go to 'my groups' in your profile to find the group.
Louie xoxox