New girl on the block

mmm... you say, "staying strong"  - that has its ups and downs, I'd say. A fortnight ago I finished my 25 lots of radio after my 6 cycles of chemo - what a long haul it's been since diagnosis end of July last year. I worked in a job through it as we have a big mortgage and three kids still at school. Also, I had just started a one-year contract on the day I was diagnosed - and I felt I just had to try and succeed as best I could (I've been promised a 'real' ie permanent job for three years but it hadn't materialised). It's been tough. I used up the minimal sick leave I had doing one week off out of the three through chemo - though there were some cycles worse than others I had to shuffle a bit. For the radio, I went in each morning before work - luckily the hospital is down the hill from the uni where i work. What i didn't realise was how expensive going private was going to be - but I heard that if I wanted to be public then I couldn't dictate what time I would have the radio, and as I have teaching & other responsibilities that were time-dependant, i felt I had to. Anyway, I finally seem to have my brain back (mostly), though I was wrong to disobey the specialist who begged me to take time off after my radio finished, as it's a time of rebound fatigue. Because of the teaching I didn't feel I could - though I admit now it was a mistake. Not all my colleagues have been that understanding, and I felt picked on at one point in the tea room and told them I was pissed off and going home early! I still feel awkward about that. It was the same day my job got advertised as a permanent one - just at the point I had decided not to apply even if they ever did get around to advertising! Well, I submitted my application on Friday, and i figure if I get it, so be it, but if not, then the universe has something more exciting waiting for me. It's been great to read the posts for you Dianne, and be reminded of things. So, most importantly, hello - there are us girls (well, I'm 53) out here who have an inkling of what you are going through. I've found it pretty lonely - but the network 'chats' have helped me. Next month I'll be going to an afternoon tea with ladies from the Encore program I just completed - at last some people with whom I can say things others just don't understand (or want to hear). I always loved that poster on the ceiling in the dentist's of the kitten dangling from the tree branch... hang in there, it said. Take heart!