Can't blame you for freaking out, it must seem daunting. You will find this site helpful and the ladies will be very supportive. I'm not completely knowledgable on all chemo, I am having FEC + D over 18 weeks, followed by radium and then hormone treatment. I have had 2 doses of FEC so far, I haven't had a lot of trouble, hair is gone, mouth is sore but I haven't had any nausea so far. Just basically very tired. Everyone is different and it's usually wait and see and take one day a time. I was terrified when they said I needed chemo, but if it gives you a better chance for the future, it's a no brainer. I had to make a decision on which chemo plan, very difficult. I went with whatever would give me the least regrets down the track, should something reoccur, I wanted to look back and say I did everything I could to prevent this. Whatever decision you make, be happy with it, and you will make it through this ordeal. I'm really sorry about you not being able to have children. It's all a little unfair. One day at a time is the way to go. Best wishes for your treatment, I hope it all goes well,
Hazel xx