I've joined the bald brigade

I knew it was coming, the oncologist told me it would be soon, but even before that I knew, as I got an attack of acne on my scalp, which was not normal for me. On wednesday just gone, I was sitting at my desk at work, scratching my head, when I pulled out a clump of hair. "oh, so it's started" and then "don't pull out any more, you don't want to have to catch the ferry home with bald spots" was what I thought. It's surprising how calm and matter of fact I felt about it, I think because the medical team prepared me, and I knew it was inevitable. Couldn't wait to get home, lock myself in the bathroom and see how much I could pull out. Turns out quite a lot. For those of you who haven't gone through this yet, no, it didn't hurt, I'm not much into self punishment, just a very little pressure and a clump of hair comes away. Reminded me of stripping the coat of a moulting dog, except there is no new coat underneath. Anyway, the basin was filling up so I thought I'd cut the rest off short. Soon done as my hair is (was) baby fine anyway. Thursday off to work wearing the wig. I felt very self concious but no one noticed, except the people on my little office who know all about the cancer. Clients didn't notice. Managed to get through the day but couldn't wait to get home and take it off. Yesterday I visited my Mum, who is 80 and lives in a nursing home. I haven't told her about the bc and was worried she'd notice the wig. Well, to be honest it is much nicer than my own hair, thicker and smarter. As I entered her room she said " you look very nice today" and that was it. No questions! So for anyone out there worried about donning the wig I'd say, you'll be surprised how very unobservant the world is. Yesterday evening I got sick of pulling out my hair and the mess it made and the bald patches, so I shaved it all off. I used the hair clippers, then finished off with my electric leg shaver. I look like a monk but it feels better and is at least neat. I don't wear headgear at home and the boys (husband and grown up son) seem to cope. The baldness isn't so bad. Don't get me wrong, I'd rather have my hair, but I have the wig and some nice turbans and I've put away the hairdryer. No more daily blowdrying for me for quite a while. A bonus is I think the leg hair is going the same way. Sure won't miss those luxuriant thick black hairs that needed shaving almost daily in summer.