Got told today chemo failed

@viking1 that's so sweet of you to say. The treatment can seem never ending. It's kind of a double edged sword sharing experiences and opinions because they are so individual and in this forum everything gets highlighted and it's hard to see the context. I had a rough time there during treatment, but it's turned out well. I have just finished having a reduction on the right after an LD reconstruction. I only have a nipple tattoo/ recon to do and hopefully that will be my last surgery.

 I just read what other women like yourself are going through and I can relate to it all. I tried to push cancer to the back during treatment by continuing to work, using cold caps to try to keep my hair, driving myself to chemo for the last 3 months of it. At the time I thought it was me taking control, but as I approach the end of surgery I can see that I actually didn't let people help me, and didn't acknowledge the grip cancer had on me. That's why this forum has been so lovely. All the best with your treatment. Sometimes the fear of it is much worse than the day to day reality. xx 

@LMK74 makes you wonder! I was reading something saying my type of cancer could recur later in the same breast or the other. And I'm going, 'no, we're not having that. I'm having just the once. So forget that!'

@LucyE well I think you're amazing! And you were working too! The nurse sounds really good. To be honest, I'm at the point where I'm horrified by what I'm reading people have gone through and amazed at their resilience, like yours. The treatments are just so cruel to achieve what we pray is a positive outcome. What is next for you? xx

@viking1 the burns weren't too painful as I had numbness from the auxiliary clearance and mastectomy, which was a blessing. Some people don't burn at all and it really depends on how your skin reacts.  The nurse at the radiotherapy clinic worked with me closely to look after my skin and changed the creams depending on the redness. She followed up with me even when I was over everything and didn't want to do the booster for the last week. It all healed really quickly once I finished. I went to work without bras and just wore big scarves. I looked very daggy for a long time during treatment. LOL It was only about the week 4 mark that my skin started to turn red, then blistered and then I lost a layer. I should say I had a seroma that the beam hit and this was the area that turned red. 

All the best with it. Radiotherapy was ok for me, I just thought about the beach and tried not to stress too much. You kind of get in a zone and because I went there everyday after work I was so tired it was easy to stay still! 

@viking1, it's all a bloody pain in the arse from start to finish. Maybe I should have both boobs amputated and be done lol.
From what I hear radiation burns are like bad sunburn and heal once finished.

@LucyE that sounds painful. Do the burns heal over time? xx @LMK74 yes I can see now why some women opt for everything to be done at once if there's an option or it's your choice. One stay in hospital and one recuperation time. I am fairly anxious about the axillary path results as then it's time to move on to chemo, radiation and hormone treatment ... unless the original plan has changed. ☹

@LucyE, it sounds overall you did well with radiation so that's great.

@viking1, thanks for the tips. It's all a bloody nightmare all the terminology. Even though I feel Pissed about having a full clearance, I'd rather just the one surgery than multiple. 

I had supra clavicle radiotherapy and also along my mastectomy scar. I didn't have any burning on my upper chest or neck. I did have burns under my arm and on the back of my shoulder where the beam exited. 

I was angry to hear about the chemo @LMK74 but good to hear what oncologist said.  I had only had tonsils out at 4 and appendix out at 14 before the lumpectomy and sentinel node biopsy (9/6) followed by a full axillary clearance in right arm (3/7). The lumpectomy and s.node biopsy was the easiest. Pain wise, it's best not to put up with it they told me. The nurse said if you do, the body concentrates on the pain and not on healing ... it boiled down to that. I'm doing my lymphodema exercises. The worst thing for me was the drain from the axillary clearance as it is a pain trying to sleep. I had a nurse come to the house every day to check my obs and the drain for 7 days. It lost suction twice due to a faulty tube so was probably in for longer than it should be. But throughout the clearance I'd rate my highest pain as 3.  I do have some weird sensations in my arm and right breast. They gave me antibiotics, anti inflams. and painkillers if I felt panadol wasn't enough. I was pretty upset after the initial surgery because when I came out of the anaesthetic the surgeon said they biopsied two nodes and they were clear. They do it while you're under and he was going to do a full axillary clearance if the biopsy showed cancer. So for two weeks I thought I was pretty lucky. At the next appointment he said they actually took 5 nodes and 2 of the 5 were cancerous. Apparently the on the spot check was fast and incorrect. Hence he booked me in for a full clearance. This meant going in through my healing biopsy scar and extending it. Nothing compared to what you've been through of course . Just shows you can't really bank on things much I guess. Now I have to go back and hear how many nodes were removed and how many cancerous. I read this effects overall stats etc and after reading this section of my info book I felt like I was going to have a panic attack adding in HER2 positive, grade 3. I am PR neg but the ER is being queried as I noticed it said 80% positive on my core biopsy and negative after my lumpectomy! (I used to proof read - surgeon was surprised when I mentioned error!) So again, you seem to need to be able to have your wits about you whilst being rendered witless. When you do have the clearance, ask if you can take some probiotics if they give you the same meds as me. I forgot to take mine and think either the antibiotics or anti inflams. made me feel yucky. Thinking of you xxx