Forum Discussion

melclarity's avatar
9 years ago

Final Countdown 3 days to go for Mastectomy and Diep Flap reconstruction....YIKES!!!!!!

Hello My Fellow Courageous Beautiful Friends!!!! Well a few weeks ago I wasn't traveling very well, as we know too well that emotional roller coaster! I have since had an appointment with a Psychologist I saw 3 yrs ago and it was invaluable. It helped incredibly to try and put it all into perspective. She pointed out that our logical thinking comes from the frontal lobe but unfortunately my emotional body hasnt caught up to the logic of whats happening eventhough I know it has to happen because it makes sense. The other thing she pointed out is the attachment I have to my physicality and all my bits and pieces, of course am human this is what we are...but this is not the essence of who I am..I am so much more than that and the irony is when people see me they dont see my physicality they see the depths of the person I am. Somehow separating myself a little in that way has helped with letting go. The other thing was she said I was grieving, grieving the loss of my breast, grieving the struggle the past 6 years all very valid and is important. I feel I turned a corner. I finished work yesterday and the reality hit as I drove home in tears even at my age wishing my MUM was here to wipe them away...OH DEAR LOL So honestly?? I am incredibly nervous!!! and yeah scared of the whole thing, the pain of it, recovery...the end result...but am calm and trying to do one day at a time...just get to Monday and get to surgery thats all!!!! PHEW!!!