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Fiona_46's avatar
Fiona_46
Member
12 years ago

Feeling Anxious!

Had my first surgery nearly two weeks ago for lumpectomy & auxillary clearance. Now have to go back for further surgery this Thursday b/c the tumour they thought was 2.5cm was actually 4.5 cm (dense breast). 7 out of 12 nodes involved, Grade 3 Invasive Ductal carcinoma, Her2 positive. Booked in for CT & bone scans & gated blood tests next week, then Oncology. Was not expecting these results at all! I've always been a strong positive person but even my resolve has started to crumble. Feeling very nervous re: next weeks tests. They're going to throw everything at it to give me the best possible chance. I know it might seem insignificant in the bigger picture but knowing I'm going to lose my hair freaks me out a bit, I've never had short hair since I was a toddler (let alone no hair!).
her2
lumpectomy

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  • Rita1963's avatar
    Rita1963
    Member
    12 years ago

    Wow! to read your post brought tears and emotions flooding back.  I remember the feeling exactly the same, overwhelmed, frightened no I was terrified, but now 3 months in having had surgery and currently having chemo with further treatments to follow, I am slowly adjusting and accepting this hiccup in my life plan.  Like you the hair loss impacted me the most emotionally, I had never been attached to my hair until I was going to lose it.  I was advised to cut my hair short so I had a buzz cut, yes brutal but when my hair started falling out it was alot easier to manage and thankful that I had done it.  It has taken a few weeks but now it isn't such an issue to me.  It has taken me awhile but slowly my emotions are stabilizing and negativity and fear subsiding.  Take care, keep in touch I found this site so helpful and still do.  love Rita x

     

  • Fiona_46's avatar
    Fiona_46
    Member
    12 years ago
    Thanks Robyn, I do hope I find I embrace it like you did
  • Fiona_46's avatar
    Fiona_46
    Member
    12 years ago
    Thanks Donna, much appreciated. It really helps having positive comments from someone :) x
  • Robyn_W's avatar
    Robyn_W
    Member
    12 years ago
    It is always difficult when the initial diagnosis changes,but I think it's not uncommon.I guess the more tests they do,the more they find out.Try to keep in your mind,that BC really is very treatable these days,and most ladies go on to lead long healthy lives.I agree with Donna about the hair.Initially,it is a bit confronting to lose your hair,but I actually grew to love it!I am 59 years old,and in a million years I would never have believed that I could feel that way .I am 7 months past chemo and I feel great.My hair is thicker than it has ever been,and it is sort of wavy.We are coming into summer soon,so being bald will be so easy and cool.:) I never bought a wig,but I loved my turbans and cotton caps,and I also had a few brightly coloured scarves.Take care and stay in touch.xoxRobyn
  • mgndam1603's avatar
    mgndam1603
    Member
    12 years ago

    I am sorry to hear about your results and the return to surgery. Its ok to feel down about these things, being positive doesn't mean we never have bad moments.

    Vent as much as you need to on this site, we are here to listen and to support you through whatever you may need.

    As for the hair, we all feel that way, my son got so angry at me when I was devestated about losing my hair, he told me he was facing losing his mother so what was hair! That made me rethink things and yes it was difficult, like you I had long hair, so when my chemo started I had my hair cut short 2 weeks to the day it started to fall out, It was easier with short hair to manage that process and athen a week later I shaved it off. Honestly within a short period I stopped worrying about being bald there was too much else going on.

    I am now 14 months post chemo and 8 months post all treatment and surgeries and I have beautiful think hair. Its like a bob now and it came back curly, the curls are finally turning to waves but I am so happy to have a head full of hair.

    So just concentrate on getting better and don't worry to much about the hair, it will return.

    Sending you hugs

    Donna